§6.389Osuspectus tibi sit quanto vox mollior et quo §6.390Osaepius in teneris haerebit dextera lumbis,
Let him be suspected by you, the softer his voice is, and the more often his right hand lingers on his tender loins.
This one will be strongest in bed: there, the Thais danced by the submissive Triphallus casts off her mask.
§6.393O‘quem rides? aliis hunc mimum! sponsio fiat:
"Whom are you laughing at? Show this mime to others!
§6.394Opurum te contendo virum, contendo: fateris? §6.395Oan vocat ancillas tortoris pergula?’ Novi §6.396Oconsilia et veteres quaecumque monetis amici: §6.397Opone seram, cohibe. sed quis custodiat ipsos §6.398Ocustodes, qui nunc lascivae furta puellae §6.399Ohac mercede silent? crimen commune tacetur:
Let a bet be made: I contend that you are a real man, I contend; do you confess, or does the torturer's workshop call your slave-girls?" I know your plans and whatever you old friends advise: "Put on a lock, keep her in." But who will guard the guards themselves, who now keep silent about the wanton girl's deceits for this reward?
§6.400Oprospicit hoc prudens et ab illis incipit uxor
A common crime is kept quiet, and the clever wife foresees this and begins with them.
§6.366Sunt quas eunuchi inbelles ac mollia semper §6.367oscula delectent et desperatio barbae §6.368et quod abortivo non est opus.
There are those whom warless eunuchs and their always soft kisses delight, and the despair of a beard, and that there is no need for an abortive.
illa voluptas §6.369summa tamen, quod iam calida matura iuventa §6.370inguina traduntur medicis, iam pectine nigro;
That pleasure is supreme, however, because their groin, already mature in warm youth, is handed over to the doctors, with a black pubic hair already.
§6.371ergo expectatos ac iussos crescere primum §6.372testiculos, postquam coeperunt esse bilibres, §6.373tonsoris damno tantum rapit Heliodorus.
Therefore Heliodorus snatches away the testicles, expected and ordered to grow first, after they began to weigh two pounds, only to the loss of the barber.
§6.373amangonum pueros vera ac miserabilis urit §6.373bdebilitas, follisque pudet cicerisque relicti.
A true and pitiable weakness burns the boys of the slave-dealers, and they are ashamed of the bag and the left-behind chickpea.
§6.374bconspicuus longe cunctisque notabilis intrat §6.375balnea nec dubie custodem vitis et horti §6.376provocat a domina factus spado, dormiat ille
Conspicuous from afar and notable to everyone, he enters the baths, and without doubt the gelding, made so by his mistress, challenges the guardian of the vine and garden.
§6.377cum domina, sed tu iam durum, Postume, iamque §6.378tondendum eunucho Bromium committere noli.
Let him sleep with his mistress, but you, Postumus, do not trust Bromius, already hard and now needing to be shaved, to a eunuch.
§6.379Si gaudet cantu, nullius fibula durat §6.380vocem vendentis praetoribus, organa semper §6.381in manibus, densi radiant testudine tota §6.382sardonyches; crispo numerantur pectine chordae, §6.383quo tener Hedymeles operas dedit: hunc tenet, hoc se §6.384solatur, gratoque indulget basia plectro.
If she delights in song, the clasp of no one who sells his voice to the praetors lasts; instruments are always in her hands; numerous sardonyxes gleam across the whole tortoiseshell; the strings are counted with a trembling plectrum, with which the tender Hedymeles performed: she holds this, with this she consoles herself, and bestows kisses on the pleasing plectrum.
§6.385quaedam de numero Lamiarum ac nominis Appi §6.386et farre et vino Ianum Vestamque rogabat, §6.387an Capitolinam deberet Pollio quercum
A certain woman from the number of the Lamiae and the name of Appius was asking Janus and Vesta with meal and wine whether Pollio ought to hope for the Capitoline oak and promise it to his lyre.
§6.388sperare et fidibus promittere, quid faceret plus §6.389aegrotante viro, medicis quid tristibus erga
What more would she do if her husband were sick, what more if the doctors were gloomy toward her little son?
§6.390filiolum? stetit ante aram nec turpe putavit §6.391pro cithara velare caput dictataque verba §6.392pertulit, ut mos est, et aperta palluit agna.
She stood before the altar, nor did she think it shameful to veil her head for a lyre, and she went through the dictated words, as is the custom, and grew pale when the lamb was opened.
§6.393dic mihi nunc quaeso, die, antiquissime divom, §6.394respondes his, Iane pater? magna otia caeli; §6.395non est, quod video, non est quod agatur aput vos.
Tell me now, I pray, tell me, oldest of the gods, father Janus, do you reply to these? Great is the leisure of heaven; there is nothing, as I see, there is nothing to be done among you.
This one consults you about comic actors, that one will want to recommend a tragic actor; the haruspex will get varicose veins.
§6.398Sed cantet potius quam totam pervolet urbem §6.399audax et coetus possit quae ferre virorum §6.400cumque paludatis ducibus praesente marito §6.401ipsa loqui recta facie siccisque mamillis.
But let her sing rather than fly through the whole city, bold, and able to endure assemblies of men, and to speak herself with a straight face and dry breasts to generals in military cloaks in her husband's presence.
§6.402haec eadem novit quid toto fiat in orbe, quid Seres, §6.403quid Thraces agant, secreta novercae §6.404et pueri, quis amet, quis diripiatur adulter; §6.405dicet quis viduam praegnatem fecerit et quo §6.406mense, quibus verbis concumbat quaeque, modis quot.
This same woman knows what is happening in the whole world, what the Seres, what the Thracians are doing, the secrets of the stepmother and the boy, who is in love, what adulterer is being fought over; she will tell who made a widow pregnant and in what month, with what words each woman copulates, and in how many ways.
§6.407instantem regi Armenio Partimque cometen §6.408prima videt, famam rumoresque illa recentis §6.409excipit ad portas, quosdam facit; isse Niphaten §6.410in populos magnoque illic cuncta arva teneri §6.411diluvio, nutare urbes, subsidere terras §6.412quocumque in trivio cuicumque est obvia, narrat.
She is the first to see the comet threatening the Armenian king and the Parthians; she intercepts fresh rumors and gossip at the gates, and makes up some; she tells that the Niphates has gone over people, and all the fields there are held by a great flood, cities are tottering, lands are sinking, at every crossroads to whoever she meets.
§6.413Nec tamen id vitium magis intolerabile quam quae §6.414vicinos humiles rapere et concidere loris
Nor yet is that vice more intolerable than she who is accustomed, though pleaded with, to seize her humble neighbors and cut them with lashes.
§6.415exorata solet, nam si latratibus alti §6.416rumpuntur somni,
fustes huc ocius,
inquit, §6.417adferte
atque illis dominum iubet ante feriri, §6.418deinde canem, gravis occursu, taeterrima vultu.
For if her deep sleep is broken by barking, "Bring clubs here quickly!" she says, and orders the master to be beaten first with them, and then the dog.
§6.419balnea nocte subit, conchas et castra moveri §6.420nocte iubet, magno gaudet sudare tumultu, §6.421cum lassata gravi ceciderunt bracchia massa, §6.422callidus et cristae digitos inpressit aliptes §6.423ac summum dominae femur exclamare coegit,
Heavy to encounter, most terrible in face, she goes to the baths at night, she orders her vessels and camp to be moved at night; she rejoices to sweat with great tumult when her arms, exhausted by the heavy dumbbell, have fallen; the clever masseur presses his fingers into her private parts and forces the top of his mistress's thigh to cry out.
Meanwhile her wretched guests are pressed by sleep and hunger.
tandem illa venit rubicundula, totum §6.426oenophorum sitiens, plena quod tenditur urna §6.427admotum pedibus, de quo sextarius alter §6.428ducitur ante cibum rabidam facturus orexim, §6.429dum redit et loto terram ferit intestino,
At last she comes, a little red, thirsting for the whole wine-vessel, which is presented full with a whole urn at her feet, from which a second sextarius is drained before food, about to make a rabid appetite, while it returns and hits the ground with her washed stomach.