§12.18.1quod extremum fuit in ea epistula quam a te proxime accepi, ad id primum respondebo; animum adverti enim hoc vos magnos oratores facere non numquam.
As to the last point in the letter which I recently received from you, I will reply to that first; for I have noticed that you great orators sometimes do this.
epistulas requiris meas; ego autem numquam, cum mihi denuntiatum esset a tuis ire aliquem, non dedi.
You ask for my letters; but I have never failed to give one whenever I was informed by your people that someone was leaving.
quod mihi videor ex tuis litteris intellegere te nihil commissurum esse temere nec ante quam scisses quo iste nescio qui Caecilius Bassus erumperet quicquam certi constituturum, id ego et speraram prudentia tua fretus et ut confiderem fecerunt tuae gratissimae mihi litterae, idque ut facias quam saepissime, ut et quid tu agas et quid agatur scire possim et etiam quid acturus sis, valde te rogo.
As to what I seem to understand from your letter—that you will do nothing rashly, nor make any definite decision before you know where that blockhead of a Caecilius Bassus is going to break out—I had both hoped for this, relying on your prudence, and your letter, which was most welcome to me, made me confident of it; and I strongly request you to do so as often as possible, so that I may know both what you are doing, what is being done, and even what you are going to do.
etsi periniquo patiebar animo te a me digredi, tamen eo tempore me consolabar, quod et in summum otium te ire arbitrabar et ab impendentibus magnis negotiis discedere
Although I bore your departure from me with a very heavy heart, yet at that time I consoled myself with the thought that you were going into the greatest quiet and departing from impending great troubles.
§12.18.2utrumque contra accidit; istic enim bellum est exortum, hic pax consecuta, sed tamen eius modi pax in qua, si adesses, multa te non delectarent, ea tamen quae ne ipsum Caesarem quidem delectant.
Both turned out the contrary; for there war has broken out, here peace has followed—but yet a peace of such a kind that, if you were present, many things would not please you, things indeed which do not please even Caesar himself.
bellorum enim civilium ii semper exitus sunt, ut non ea solum fiant quae velit victor, sed etiam ut iis mos gerendus sit quibus adiutoribus sit parta victoria.
For such are always the outcomes of civil wars, that not only those things are done which the victor wishes, but also that compliance must be shown to those by whose help the victory was won.
equidem sic iam obdurui ut ludis Caesaris nostri animo aequissimo viderem T. Plancum, audirem Laberi et Publili poemata.
For my part, I have already become so hardened that at the games of our Caesar I looked upon Titus Plancus with the greatest equanimity, and listened to the plays of Laberius and Publilius.
nihil mihi tam desse scito quam quicum haec familiariter docteque rideam.
Know that I lack nothing so much as someone with whom I may laugh at these things familiarly and learnedly.
is tu eris, si quam primum veneris; quod ut facias, non mea solum sed etiam tua interesse arbitror.
You will be that person, if you come as soon as possible; and that you should do so, I think is of importance not only to me but also to you.