§1.9.5etsi iam primis temporibus illis multis rebus meus offendebatur animus, cum te agente de reliqua nostra dignitate aut occulta non nullorum odia aut obscura in me studia cernebam; nam neque de monimentis meis ab iis adiutus es, a quibus debuisti, neque de vi nefaria, qua cum fratre eram domo expulsus, neque hercule in iis ipsis rebus, quae quamquam erant mihi propter rei familiaris naufragia necessariae, tamen a me minimi putabantur, in meis damnis ex auctoritate senatus sarciendis eam voluntatem, quam exspectaram, praestiterunt.
And yet, even from those early times, my mind was offended by many things, when, while you were acting for our remaining dignity, I perceived either the hidden hatred of some or the lukewarm support towards me; for you were neither helped concerning my monuments by those by whom you ought to have been, nor concerning the heinous violence by which I had been expelled from my home along with my brother, nor indeed, by Hercules, in those very matters which, although necessary for me because of the shipwreck of my family property, were yet thought of very little account by me, namely, in repairing my damages by the authority of the senate, did they show that goodwill which I had expected.
quae cum viderem (neque erant obscura), non tamen tam acerba mihi haec accidebant, quam erant illa grata, quae fecerant.
And though I saw these things (nor were they obscure), yet these occurrences did not happen to me with so much bitterness as those things which they had done were pleasing.
§1.9.6itaque, quamquam et Pompeio plurimum te quidem ipso praedicatore ac teste debebam et eum non solum beneficio, sed amore etiam et perpetuo quodam iudicio meo diligebam, tamen non reputans, quid ille vellet, in omnibus meis sententiis de re publica pristinis permanebam.
And so, although I owed very much to Pompey, with you yourself indeed as spokesman and witness, and loved him not only for his benefit, but also out of affection and a certain constant judgment of mine, yet, not reflecting on what he wished, I persisted in all my former opinions concerning the republic.
§1.9.7ego sedente Cn.
When Cn.
Pompeio, cum, ut laudaret P. Sestium, introisset in urbem dixissetque testis Vatinius me fortuna et felicitate C. Caesaris commotum illi amicum esse coepisse, dixi me M. Bibuli fortunam, quam ille adflictam putaret, omnium triumphis victoriisque anteferre, dixique eodem teste alio loco eosdem esse, qui Bibulum exire domo prohibuissent et qui me coegissent; tota vero interrogatio mea nihil habuit nisi reprehensionem illius tribunatus.
Pompey was sitting by, and when, in order to praise P. Sestium, he had entered the city, and the witness Vatinius had said that I, moved by the fortune and success of C. Caesar, had begun to be a friend to him, I said that I preferred the fortune of M. Bibulus, which he thought afflicted, to all the triumphs and victories of any men, and I said, with the same witness present in another place, that those who had prohibited Bibulus from leaving his house were the very same who had compelled me; indeed, my whole cross-examination contained nothing but a censure of his tribunate.
in quo omnia dicta sunt libertate animoque maximo de vi, de auspiciis, de donatione regnorum, neque vero hac in causa modo, sed constanter saepe in senatu.
In which all things were spoken with the greatest freedom and spirit concerning violence, auspices, and the donation of kingdoms, and that not only in this case, but constantly and frequently in the senate.
§1.9.8quin etiam Marcellino et Philippo consulibus Nonis Aprilibus mihi est senatus adsensus, ut de agro Campano frequenti senatu Idibus Maiis referretur.
Nay, even in the consulship of Marcellinus and Philippus, on the Nones of April, the senate agreed with my motion that the question of the Campanian land should be referred to a full senate on the Ides of May.
num potui magis in arcem illius causae invadere aut magis oblivisci temporum meorum, meminisse actionum? hac a me sententia dicta magnus animorum motus est factus cum eorum, quorum oportuit, tum illorum etiam, quorum numquam putaram.
Could I have invaded the very citadel of that cause more, or could I have more forgotten my own circumstances and remembered my past actions? When this opinion was delivered by me, a great commotion of minds was produced, both of those whom it behoved to be moved and also of those of whom I had never expected it.
§1.9.9nam hoc senatus consulto in meam sententiam facto Pompeius cum mihi nihil ostendisset se esse offensum, in Sardiniam et in Africam profectus est eoque itinere Lucam ad Caesarem venit.
For when this decree of the senate was passed in accordance with my opinion, Pompey, although he had shown me no sign that he was offended, set out for Sardinia and Africa, and on that journey came to Caesar at Luca.
ibi multa de mea sententia questus est Caesar, quippe qui etiam Ravennae Crassum ante vidisset ab eoque in me esset incensus.
There Caesar complained much about my opinion, inasmuch as he had also previously seen Crassus at Ravenna, and had been inflamed by him against me.
sane moleste Pompeium id ferre constabat; quod ego cum audissem ex aliis, maxime ex meo fratre cognovi.
It was clearly established that Pompey bore this with great annoyance; which, although I had heard it from others, I learned most especially from my brother.
quem cum in Sardinia Pompeius paucis post diebus quam Luca discesserat convenisset, 'te,' inquit, 'ipsum cupio; nihil opportunius potuit accidere.
Whom when Pompey had met in Sardinia a few days after he had departed from Luca, he said, 'You are the very man I want; nothing more timely could have happened.
Nisi cum Marco fratre diligenter egeris, dependendum tibi est, quod mihi pro illo spopondisti. ' quid multa? questus est graviter;
Unless you deal earnestly with your brother Marcus, you must pay down what you guaranteed to me on his behalf.' Why say more?
sua merita commemoravit quid egisset saepissime de actis Caesaris cum ipso meo fratre quidque sibi is de me recepisset, in memoriam redegit seque, quae de mea salute egisset, voluntate Caesaris egisse ipsum meum fratrem testatus est.
He complained heavily; he recalled his own merits, brought to mind what he had very often discussed with my brother himself concerning Caesar's acts, and what my brother had promised him concerning me, and declared, with my brother himself as witness, that what he had done for my safety he had done with the consent of Caesar.
cuius causam dignitatemque mihi ut commendaret, rogavit ut eam ne oppugnarem, si nollem aut non possem tueri.
In order to commend to me Caesar's cause and dignity, he asked that I would not oppose it, if I were unwilling or unable to defend it.