§8## Ὀπώρα Δερκύλλῳ.
## Opora to Dercyllus.
σὺ μὲν εἴτε σπουδάζεις ἐς τὸ ὄνομα τὸ ἐμὸν εἴτε παίζεις οἶσθα δήπου αὐτός, ἐγὼ δὲ οἷς πέμπεις οὐκ ἀξιῶ πρός με ὡραΐζεσθαι.
Whether you are serious about my name or are jesting, you surely know best yourself; but for my part, I do not think it fitting that you should show off to me with the things you send.
καλὰ γάρ σου τὰ δῶρα ἀκρόδρυα δυοῖν ὀβολοῖν καὶ ὑβριστὴς οἶνος διὰ νεότητα· πίοι δʼ ἂν ἡ Φρυγία αὐτόν· ἐγὼ δὲ Λέσβιον πίνω καὶ Θάσιον καὶ ἀργυρίου δέομαι·
For your fine gifts are wild fruits worth two obols, and a wine that is insolent because of its youth; a Phrygian woman might drink it, but I drink Lesbian and Thasian, and what I need is money.
ὀπώραν δὲ ὀπώρᾳ ἀποστέλλειν αὐτόχρημα πῦρ ἐπὶ πῦρ φέρειν ἐστί.
And to send fruit (opora) to Opora is literally to carry fire to fire.
κἀκεῖνο δέ σε οὐ χεῖρον εἰδέναι ταύτῃ ᾗπερ οὖν καὶ αὐτὴ νοῶ.
And it is no bad thing for you to know this in the very way that I myself understand it.
τοῦ γὰρ χρηματίζεσθαι παρὰ τῶν βουλομένων μοι προσιέναι καὶ τὸ ὄνομα αἴτιον· παιδεύει γάρ με ὅτι καὶ τὸ κάλλος τῶν σωμάτων ὀπώρᾳ ἔοικεν.
For my name is also a cause of my making money from those who wish to approach me; for it teaches me that the beauty of bodies also resembles autumn fruit.
ἕως οὖν ἀκμάζει, καὶ τὴν ὑπὲρ αὐτοῦ χάριν προσῆκόν ἐστιν ἀνταπολαμβάνειν· ἐὰν δὲ ἀπορρεύσῃ, τί ἂν ἄλλο εἴη τὸ ἡμέτερον ἢ δένδρον καρπῶν ἅμα καὶ φύλλων γυμνόν;
Therefore, while it is at its peak, it is fitting to receive in return the reward for it; but if it should fade away, what else would our condition be but a tree stripped of both fruit and leaves?
καίτοιγε ἐκείνοις μὲν ἡ φύσις δίδωσιν ἀναθῆλαι· ἑταίρας δὲ ὀπώρα μία.
And yet, to those trees nature grants to bloom again; but a courtesan has only one autumn.
δεῖ τοίνυν ἐντεῦθεν ταμιεύεσθαι πρὸς τὸ γῆρας.
Therefore, from this source one must lay up stores for old age.
§9## Χρέμης Παρμένωνι.
## Chremes to Parmenon.
ὀψὲ ἔμαθον ὅτι μοι συνεβούλευες καλῶς, παιδεύων με ἀποδιδράσκειν τὰς ἑταίρας·
Late have I learned that you advised me well, teaching me to run away from courtesans; for they gape to take, and pretend to love, and constantly shut one out.
λαβεῖν γὰρ κεχήνασι καὶ προσποιοῦνται φιλεῖν καὶ ἀποκλείουσι συνεχῶς καὶ τὸ πάντων μοι βαρύτατον πρὶν ὑπερπλησθῆναι καὶ γενέσθαι διακορεῖς οὐ βούλονται συγκαθεύδειν, ἀλλὰ ἀκκίζονται καὶ θρύπτονται, εἶτα μιστυλῶνται πάλιν, καὶ λάθρᾳ μὲν ἀλοῶσι πάντα καὶ καταπίνουσιν ὑπὲρ τοὺς ἐργαστῆρας τοὺς ἐν ἀγρῷ, παρόντων δὲ ἡμῶν ὡραΐζονται.
And, what is most grievous of all to me, before they are gorged and fully satisfied they refuse to sleep with us, but play coy and put on airs, and then they fleece us again. And in secret they devour and swallow down everything more than the laborers in the field, but in our presence they act like dainty ladies.
ἐγὼ δὲ κατὰ χειρὸς ποιῶ πάντα καὶ σπεύδω καταλαβεῖν ἐς δύο τὰ σκέλη ἄρας καὶ ὑποστρέφειν ἐπὶ τὰς αἶγας πάλιν.
For my part, I wash my hands of it all, and taking to my heels I hasten to reach safety and return to my goats again.
ἐμέλλησα δʼ ἂν τὴν κάκιστα ἀπολουμένην Θηβαΐδα αὐλουμένην πρός με ἀράμενος μέσην εἶτα ῥίψας ἐς τὸ κλινίδιον ἔχεσθαι τῆς σπουδῆς.
I was on the point of lifting that cursed Thebais by the waist as she played the flute for me, throwing her onto the little couch, and going about my business.
ἀπόλοιτο δὲ ὁ στρατιώτης ὁ διακωλύσας με·
May the soldier who prevented me perish!
Θρασυλέων, οἶμαι, ἦν ὄνομα αὐτῷ ἢ ἄλλο τι τοιοῦτον συμπεπλεγμένον θηρίῳ.
Thrasyleon, I believe, was his name, or some other such name compounded with a wild beast.
§10## Φιλέριφος Σιμύλῳ.
## Phileriphus to Simylus.
πέπυσμαί σου τὸν ὗν εἶναι λάγνην.
I have heard that your boar is lustful.
τί οὖν αὐτὸν οὐ βίᾳ συλλαβὼν τομίαν εἰργάσω, ὥσπερ εἰώθαμεν τοὺς τράγους ἡμεῖς;
Why then did you not seize him by force and make him a gelding, just as we are accustomed to do with our he-goats?
τοῦτο γάρ τοι καὶ τὰ ζῷα ἀναπείθει ἡσυχίαν τε ἔχειν καὶ σωφρονεῖν εὖ μάλα.
For this indeed persuades even animals to keep quiet and behave themselves very well.
εἰμὶ δὲ ἐγὼ περὶ ταῦτα δήπου δεινός· ἀποφανῶ γὰρ παραχρῆμα ὁλόκληρον, σάξας ἁλῶν καὶ ἐπαλείψας πίτταν·
I am indeed skilled in these matters; for I will render him completely sound in no time, after stuffing him with salt and smearing him with pitch.
εἶτα ὑγιεινότερος ἔσται Κρότωνος δήπου καὶ κολοκύντης, καὶ ἐρῶν παύσεται καὶ ἐπιτρίβων σοι τὴν οὐσίαν.
Then he will surely be healthier than Croton and a pumpkin, and he will stop being in heat and wasting your property.
ἐνόρχην δὲ ἀκόλαστον ὑγιαίνων τρέφοι τίς ἄν;
For who in his right mind would keep an undisciplined, uncastrated beast?
§11## Λαμπρίας Τρύφῃ.
## Lamprias to Tryphe.
ἀγαθὰς διώκειν οἱ νεανίσκοι τρέφουσι κύνας, δρομικώτερον δὲ λαγὼν οὐδὲ ἀσαρκότερον οὐδεπώποτε ἐθεασάμην· θαῦμα γὰρ ὅπως καὶ κατέλαβον αὐτόν.
Young men keep good dogs for hunting, but a faster or leaner hare I have never yet beheld; indeed, it is a wonder how they even caught it.
ἐπεὶ γὰρ ἐδάρη καὶ τὸ δέρμα ἀπεδύσατο, φανερὸς τηνικαῦτα ἐγένετο, μᾶλλον δὲ ʽοὐ γὰρ ὀρθῶς λέγὠ ἀφανής ἐστι νῦν ἔτι πλέον.
For when it was skinned and its hide taken off, it became visible then—or rather (for I do not speak correctly), it is now even more invisible.
σὺ δέ, ὦ Τρύφη, κιχλίζουσα παῦσαι πρός με· ἐὰν γάρ σε, ὦ κακόδαιμον, ὁ πατὴρ ἴδῃ, λήψῃ τι πάντως κακόν.
But you, Tryphe, stop giggling at me; for if your father sees you, you unhappy girl, you will surely get some trouble.
ἐγὼ δὲ αὐτὸν ὑποδέδοικα καίτοι παρόντα ὄντα· σὺ δὲ οὐκ οἶδα ὅπως διατέθρυψαι καὶ καταφρονεῖς αὐτοῦ.
I am in dread of him even though he is present; but you, I know not how you have become so pampered that you look down on him.
§12## Τρύφη Λαμπρία.
## Tryphe to Lamprias.
Προσπατταλεύσομεν, ὦ Λαμπρία, τοῦ λαγὼ τὴν δοράν, ἵνα σοι τῶν κυνηγεσίων ἄγαλμα ᾖ τοῦτο κατὰ τοὺς μεγάλους ἐκείνους δήπου θηρευτάς.
We shall nail up the hare's skin, Lamprias, so that it may be a monument of your hunting exploits for you, surely in the manner of those great hunters.
ἔσται δὴ καὶ τὸ σὸν εὔθηρον ἀνάγραπτον.
Your success in the chase will indeed be recorded.
πότερον δὲ αὐτὸς ᾕρηκας ἢ δῶρον εἴληφας;
But did you catch it yourself, or did you receive it as a gift?
πῶς δὲ καὶ ὤφθη τὴν ἀρχὴν διὰ σμικρότητα;
And how indeed was it seen at all in the first place, on account of its smallness?
εὔρινοι ἄρα ὄντως ἦσαν αἱ κύνες· οὐ γὰρ ἦν αὐτὸν ἰδεῖν, ἀλλʼ ᾔσθοντο αὐτοῦ.
The dogs then must have been truly keen-scented; for it was not possible to see it, but they sensed it.
σὺ δὲ ἐξ οὗ θηρᾶν ἤρξω γέγονας ἡμῖν αὐτόχρημα Ἱππόλυτος.
And ever since you began to hunt, you have become for us literally a Hippolytus.
ὅρα δὴ τὴν Ἀφροδίτην μὴ καὶ σοὶ διὰ τὴν ὑπεροψίαν μηνίσῃ.
Take care, then, lest Aphrodite be angry with you too on account of your disdain.
§13## Καλλιππίδης Κνήμωνι.
## Callippides to Cnemon.
ἀγροίκου βίου τά τε ἄλλα ἐστὶ καλὰ καὶ δὴ καὶ τὸ ἥμερον τοῦ τρόπου· ἡ γὰρ ἡσυχία καὶ τὸ ἄγειν σχολὴν τοῖς τῆς γῆς καλὴν πραότητα ἐνεργάζεται.
The rustic life is beautiful in other respects, and especially for the gentleness of character it brings; for quietness and having leisure work a beautiful mildness in the dwellers of the soil.
σὺ δὲ οὐκ οἶδʼ ὅπως ἀγροῖκος εἶ καὶ γείτοσιν οὐκ ἀγαθὸς πάροικος.
But you, I know not how, are uncouth and not a good neighbor to your neighbors.
βάλλεις γοῦν ἡμᾶς ταῖς βώλοις καὶ ταῖς ἀχράσι καὶ μέγα κέκραγας ἰδὼν ἄνθρωπον ὡς διώκων λύκον, καὶ ἀργαλέος εἶ καὶ τοῦτο δὴ τὸ λεγόμενον ἁλμυρὸν γειτόνημα· ἐγὼ δὲ εἰ μὴ πατρῷον ἀγρὸν ἐγεώργουν, ἄσμενος ἂν αὐτὸν ἀπεδόμην φυγῇ φοβεροῦ γείτονος.
At any rate, you pelt us with clods of earth and wild pears, and shout loudly when you see a man, as if you were chasing a wolf; and you are troublesome, and indeed what is called a "salty neighbor"; and for my part, if I were not farming my ancestral field, I would gladly have sold it to escape a fearsome neighbor.
ἀλλʼ, ὦ βέλτιστε Κνήμων, τὸ σκαιὸν τοῦ τρόπου κατάλυσον, μηδέ σε ὁ θυμὸς ἐς λήθην προαγέτω, μὴ καὶ μανεὶς σεαυτὸν λάθῃς.
But, my good Cnemon, put an end to the perversity of your character, and let not anger lead you into forgetfulness, lest you even go mad without realizing it.
ταῦτά σοι φίλα παρὰ φίλου παραγγέλματα ἔστω καὶ ἴαμα τοῦ τρόπου.
Let these be friendly counsels to you from a friend, and a remedy for your character.