Humanitext Reader

Aristotle · Nicomachean Ethics §4.6

Friendliness as the Mean in Social Intercourse

Passage 47 of 123 · Greek

Summary

This chunk discusses the unnamed virtue of social intercourse, which resembles friendliness. By contrasting it with the excess of obsequiousness or flattery and the deficiency of cantankerousness, the author clarifies that the person in the mean state decides whether to please or cause pain based on what is noble and expedient.

§4.6ἐν δὲ ταῖς ὁμιλίαις καὶ τῷ συζῆν καὶ λόγων καὶ πραγμάτων κοινωνεῖν οἳ μὲν ἄρεσκοι δοκοῦσιν εἶναι, οἱ πάντα πρὸς ἡδονὴν ἐπαινοῦντες καὶ οὐθὲν ἀντιτείνοντες, ἀλλʼ οἰόμενοι δεῖν ἄλυποι τοῖς ἐντυγχάνουσιν εἶναι· οἱ δʼ ἐξ ἐναντίας τούτοις πρὸς πάντα ἀντιτείνοντες καὶ τοῦ λυπεῖν οὐδʼ ὁτιοῦν φροντίζοντες δύσκολοι καὶ δυσέριδες καλοῦνται.
But in social intercourse, in living together, and in associating in words and actions, some people seem to be obsequious, who praise everything to please others and never object to anything, but think they ought to be painless to those they meet; while those who, opposite to these, object to everything and do not care in the least about causing pain, are called cantankerous and quarrelsome.
ὅτι μὲν οὖν αἱ εἰρημέναι ἕξεις ψεκταί εἰσιν, οὐκ ἄδηλον, καὶ ὅτι ἡ μέση τούτων ἐπαινετή, καθʼ ἣν ἀποδέξεται ἃ δεῖ καὶ ὡς δεῖ, ὁμοίως δὲ καὶ δυσχερανεῖ· ὄνομα δʼ οὐκ ἀποδέδοται αὐτῇ τι, ἔοικε δὲ μάλιστα φιλίᾳ.
That the aforementioned states of character are blameworthy is not unclear, and that the mean state between them is praiseworthy, according to which one will accept what one ought and as one ought, and likewise feel annoyance; but no name has been assigned to it, though it most resembles friendliness.
τοιοῦτος γάρ ἐστιν ὁ κατὰ τὴν μέσην ἕξιν οἷον βουλόμεθα λέγειν τὸν ἐπιεικῆ φίλον, τὸ στέργειν προσλαβόντα.
For the person in the mean state is just the kind of person we wish to call a decent friend, with the addition of affectionate attachment.
διαφέρει δὲ τῆς φιλίας, ὅτι ἄνευ πάθους ἐστὶ καὶ τοῦ στέργειν οἷς ὁμιλεῖ· οὐ γὰρ τῷ φιλεῖν ἢ ἐχθαίρειν ἀποδέχεται ἕκαστα ὡς δεῖ, ἀλλὰ τῷ τοιοῦτος εἶναι.
But it differs from friendliness in that it is without passion and without affectionate attachment for those with whom he associates; for it is not because he loves or hates that he accepts everything as he ought, but because he is that kind of person.
ὁμοίως γὰρ πρὸς ἀγνῶτας καὶ γνωρίμους καὶ συνήθεις καὶ ἀσυνήθεις αὐτὸ ποιήσει, πλὴν καὶ ἐν ἑκάστοις ὡς ἁρμόζει· οὐ γὰρ ὁμοίως προσήκει συνήθων καὶ ὀθνείων φροντίζειν, οὐδʼ αὖ λυπεῖν.
For he will do the same towards strangers and surroundings, and towards those who are close and those who are not, except that he will do so in each case as is appropriate; for it is not proper to care for close friends and strangers in the same way, nor, on the other hand, to cause them pain.
καθόλου μὲν οὖν εἴρηται ὅτι ὡς δεῖ ὁμιλήσει, ἀναφέρων δὲ πρὸς τὸ καλὸν καὶ τὸ συμφέρον στοχάσεται τοῦ μὴ λυπεῖν ἢ συνηδύνειν. ἔοικε μὲν γὰρ περὶ ἡδονὰς καὶ λύπας εἶναι τὰς ἐν ταῖς ὁμιλίαις γινομένας·
Generally speaking, then, it has been said that he will associate as he ought, but, referring his actions to what is noble and expedient, he will aim at not causing pain or at contributing to pleasure.
τούτων δʼ ὅσας μὲν αὐτῷ ἐστὶ μὴ καλὸν ἢ βλαβερὸν συνηδύνειν, δυσχερανεῖ, καὶ προαιρήσεται λυπεῖν·
For this state seems to be concerned with the pleasures and pains that occur in social intercourse; and of these, whichever ones it is not noble or is harmful for him to join in pleasing, he will object to, and will choose to cause pain.
κἂν τῷ ποιοῦντι δʼ ἀσχημοσύνην φέρῃ, καὶ ταύτην μὴ μικράν, ἢ βλάβην, ἡ δʼ ἐναντίωσις μικρὰν λύπην, οὐκ ἀποδέξεται ἀλλὰ δυσχερανεῖ.
And if pleasing brings disgrace to the one who does it, and that not a small disgrace, or harm, while opposition causes only a small pain, he will not accept it but will object.
διαφερόντως δʼ ὁμιλήσει τοῖς ἐν ἀξιώμασι καὶ τοῖς τυχοῦσι, καὶ μᾶλλον ἢ ἧττον γνωρίμοις, ὁμοίως δὲ καὶ κατὰ τὰς ἄλλας διαφοράς, ἑκάστοις ἀπονέμων τὸ πρέπον, καὶ καθʼ αὑτὸ μὲν αἱρούμενος τὸ συνηδύνειν, λυπεῖν δʼ εὐλαβούμενος, τοῖς δʼ ἀποβαίνουσιν, ἐὰν ᾖ μείζω, συνεπόμενος, λέγω δὲ τῷ καλῷ καὶ τῷ συμφέροντι.
He will associate differently with those in high positions and ordinary people, and with those who are more or less acquainted with him, and likewise according to the other differences, rendering to each what is appropriate, and while choosing for its own sake to join in pleasing and being careful to avoid causing pain, yet following the consequences if they are greater—I mean what is noble and expedient.
καὶ ἡδονῆς δʼ ἕνεκα τῆς εἰσαῦθις μεγάλης μικρὰ λυπήσει.
And for the sake of a great pleasure in the future, he will cause a small pain.
ὁ μὲν οὖν μέσος τοιοῦτός ἐστιν, οὐκ ὠνόμασται δέ· τοῦ δὲ συνηδύνοντος ὁ μὲν τοῦ ἡδὺς εἶναι στοχαζόμενος μὴ διά τι ἄλλο ἄρεσκος, ὁ δʼ ὅπως ὠφέλειά τις αὑτῷ γίνηται εἰς χρήματα καὶ ὅσα διὰ χρημάτων, κόλαξ· ὁ δὲ πᾶσι δυσχεραίνων εἴρηται ὅτι δύσκολος καὶ δύσερις.
The person in the mean, then, is of this character, but has not been named; and of those who join in pleasing, the one who aims at being pleasant for no other reason is obsequious, while the one who does so to get some benefit for himself in money or what money buys is a flatterer; and the one who objects to everything has been said to be cantankerous and quarrelsome.
ἀντικεῖσθαι δὲ φαίνεται τὰ ἄκρα ἑαυτοῖς διὰ τὸ ἀνώνυμον εἶναι τὸ μέσον.
And the extremes appear to be opposed to each other because the mean is unnamed.

Notes

  1. 1126b21τὸ στέργειν προσλαβόντα — The accusative participle προσλαβόντα agrees with the accusative noun τὸν ἐπιεικῆ φίλον. This phrase means 'if he were to add affectionate attachment', indicating that the character of this mean state is like a decent friend, but with the addition of loving attachment (which the mean state itself lacks).
  2. 1126b33κἂν τῷ ποιοῦντι δʼ ἀσχημοσύνην φέρῃ — This is a conditional clause where κἄν is a contraction of καὶ ἐάν. The subject of φέρῃ is the action of pleasing (from the context). The dative participle τῷ ποιοῦντι refers to 'the one who does it' (the agent), meaning 'even if [pleasing] brings disgrace to the doer himself'.
  3. 1127a3τοῖς δʼ ἀποβαίνουσιν, ἐὰν ᾖ μείζω, συνεπόμενος — The participle συνεπόμενος agrees with the subject of the sentence. τοῖς ἀποβαίνουσιν is a dative neuter plural participle used substantively to mean 'the consequences'. The conditional clause ἐὰν ᾖ μείζω ('if they are greater/more important') refers to these consequences, meaning that the person will follow the consequences if they carry greater weight than immediate pleasure or pain.

Cite this passage

Aristotle, Nicomachean Ethics §4.6. Humanitext Reader, https://reader.humanitext.ai/en/text/urn:cts:greekLit:tlg0086.tlg010.humanitext-grc2:4.6

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