§13Λεξιφάνης
πίνωμεν οὖν,
ἦ δʼ ὃς ὁ Μεγαλώνυμος,
καὶ γὰρ καὶ λάγυνον τουτονὶ παρηβηκότος ἥκω ὑμῖν κομίζων καὶ τυροῦ τροφαλίδας καὶ ἐλαίας χαμαιπετεῖς — φυλάττω δʼ αὐτὰς ὑπὸ σφραγῖσιν θριπηδέστοις — καὶ ἄλλας ἐλαίας νευστὰς καὶ πήλινα ταυτὶ ποτήρια, ὀξυόστρακα, εὐπυνδάκωτα, ὡς ἐξ αὐτῶν πίνοιμεν, καὶ πλακοῦντα ἐξ ἐντέρων κρωβυλώδη τὴν πλοκήν.
Lexiphanes "Let us drink then," said Megalonymus, "for indeed I have come bringing you this aged wine-jar, and some rounds of cheese, and windfallen olives—I keep them under seals eaten by woodworms—and other floating olives, and these clay cups, thin-shelled and flat-bottomed, so that we may drink from them, and a cake made of entrails, woven like a hair-bun.
σὺ δʼ, ὦ παῖ, πλέον μοι τοῦ ὕδατος ἔγχει, ὡς μὴ καραιβαρεῖν ἀρξαίμην κᾆτά σοι τὸν παιδοβοσκὸν καλῶ ἐπὶ σέ·
And you, boy, pour me more water than wine, so that I may not begin to get a headache, and then I will call the child-rearer upon you.
ἴστε γὰρ ὡς ὀδυνῶμαι καὶ διέμπιλον ἔχω τὴν κεφαλήν. §14Λεξιφάνης
μετὰ δὲ τὸν ποτὸν συνυθλήσομεν οἷα καὶ ἅττʼ ἐώθαμεν· οὐ γὰρ ἄκαιρον δήπουθεν ἐν οἴνῳ φλύειν. ἐπαινῶ τοῦτο,
ἦν δʼ ἐγώ,
καὶ γὰρ ὅτιπερ ὄφελός ἐσμεν τῆς ἀττικίσεως ἄκρον. εὖ λέγεις,
ἦ δʼ ὃς ὁ Καλλικλῆς· τὸ γὰρ ἐρεσχηλεῖν ἀλλήλους συχνάκις λάλης θηγάνη γίγνεται. ἐγὼ δέ,
ἦ δʼ ὃς ὁ Εὔδημος —
κρύος γάρ ἐστιν — ἥδιον ἂν εὐζωροτέρῳ ὑποπυκνάζοιμι· καὶ γὰρ χειμοθνής εἰμι, καὶ χλιανθεὶς ἥδιον ἂν ἀκούοιμι τῶν χειρεσόφων τούτων, τοῦ τε αὐλητοῦ καὶ τῆς βαρβιτῳδοῦ. §15Λεξιφάνης
τί ταῦτα ἔφησθα, ὦ Εὔδημε;
For you know that I am in pain and have a head like felt." Lexiphanes "And after the drink, we shall babble together in our usual way; for it is surely not out of place to talk nonsense over wine." "I approve of this," said I, "for indeed we are the very pinnacle of Atticism." "Well said," said Callicles, "for rubbing against one another in banter often becomes a whetstone for talkativeness." "But as for me," said Eudemus, "since it is cold, I would more gladly top up frequently with stronger wine; for I am half-dead with cold, and once warmed up, I would gladly listen to these hand-skilled performers, both the flute-player and the lute-singing girl." Lexiphanes "Why did you say this, Eudemus?" said I.
ἦν
δʼ ἐγώ· ἀλογίαν ἡμῖν ἐπιτάττεις ὡς ἀστόμοις οὖσι καὶ ἀπεγλωττισμένοις;
"Do you enjoin silence upon us as though we were mouthless and tongueless?
ἐμοὶ δὲ ἡ γλῶττά τε ἤδη λογᾷ καὶ δὴ ἀνηγόμην γε ὡς ἀρχαιολογήσων ὑμῖν καὶ κατανίψων ἀπὸ γλώττης ἅπαντας.
But my tongue is already eager to speak, and indeed I was putting out to sea to discourse on antiquities for you and to wash everyone away with my tongue.
ἀλλὰ σὺ τὸ ὅμοιον εἰργάσω με ὥσπερ εἴ τις ὁλκάδα τριάρμενον ἐν οὐρίῳ πλέουσαν, ἐμπεπνευματωμένου τοῦ ἀκατίου, εὐφοροῦσάν τε καὶ ἀκροκυματοῦσαν, ἕκτοράς τινας ἀμφιστόμους καὶ ἰσχάδας σιδηρᾶς ἀφεὶς καὶ ναυσιπέδας ἀναχαιτίζοι τοῦ δρόμου τὸ ῥόθιον, φθόνῳ τῆς εὐηνεμίας. Οὐκοῦν,
ἦ δʼ ὅς,
σὺ μέν, εἰ βούλει, πλεῖ καὶ νεῖ καὶ θεῖ κατὰ τοῦ κλύδωνος, ἐγὼ δὲ ἀπόγειος πίνων ἅμα ὥσπερ ὁ τοῦ Ὁμήρου Ζεὺς ἢ ἀπὸ φαλάκρων ἢ ἀπὸ τῆς ἀκρουρανίας ὄψομαι διαφερόμενόν σέ τε καὶ τὴν ναῦν πρύμνηθεν ὑπὸ τοῦ ἀνέμου κατουρουμένην.
But you have treated me just as if someone, when a three-masted merchantman was sailing under a fair wind, with its small sail filled with wind, running easily and gliding over the crests of the waves, should cast double-tongued anchors, iron weights, and ship-fetters, and drag back the rush of its course, out of envy of the fair weather." "Therefore," said he, "you, if you wish, sail and swim and run against the surge; but I, remaining on shore, drinking at the same time like Homer's Zeus either from Mt.
§16Λυκῖνος
ἅλις, ὦ Λεξίφανες, καὶ ποτοῦ καὶ ἀναγνώσεως.
Phalacra or from the highest heaven, will watch you and your ship being driven by the wind from astern." Lycinus "Enough, Lexiphanes, of both drinking and reading.
ἐγὼ γοῦν ἤδη μεθύω σοι καὶ ναυτιῶ καὶ ἢν μὴ τάχιστα ἐξεμέσω πάντα ταῦτα ὁπόσα διεξελήλυθας, εὖ ἴσθι, κορυβαντιάσειν μοι δοκῶ περιβομβούμενος ὑφʼ ὧν κατεσκέδασάς μου ὀνομάτων.
I at least am already drunk because of you and feel seasick, and if I do not throw up as quickly as possible all those things you have gone through, be assured, I think I shall go mad, with my ears buzzing from the words you have poured over me.
καίτοι τὸ μὲν πρῶτον γελᾶν ἐπῄει μοι ἐπʼ αὐτοῖς, ἐπειδὴ δὲ πολλὰ καὶ πάντα ὅμοια ἦν, ἠλέουν σε τῆς κακοδαιμονίας ὁρῶν εἰς λαβύρινθον ἄφυκτον ἐμπεπτωκότα καὶ νοσοῦντα νόσον τὴν μεγίστην, μᾶλλον δὲ μελαγχολῶντα. §17Λυκῖνος
ζητῶ οὖν πρὸς ἐμαυτὸν ὁπόθεν τὰ τοσαῦτα κακὰ συνελέξω καὶ ἐν ὁπόσῳ χρόνῳ καὶ ὅπου κατακλείσας εἶχες τοσοῦτον ἐσμὸν ἀτόπων καὶ διαστρόφων ὀνομάτων, ὧν τὰ μὲν αὐτὸς ἐποίησας, τὰ δὲ κατορωρυγμένα ποθὲν ἀνασπῶν κατὰ τὸ ἰαμβεῖον
"ὄλοιο θνητῶν ἐκλέγων τὰς συμφοράς· "
τοσοῦτον βόρβορον συνερανίσας κατήντλησάς μου μηδέν σε δεινὸν εἰργασμένου.
Yet at first I felt like laughing at them, but when they were many and all alike, I pitied you for your ill fortune, seeing that you had fallen into an inescapable labyrinth and were suffering from the greatest sickness, or rather, from melancholy." Lycinus "So I ask myself from where you collected so many evils, and in how much time, and where you kept locked up such a swarm of strange and distorted words, some of which you made yourself, while others you dragged up from where they lay buried, according to the iambic line: 'May you perish, collecting the misfortunes of mortals.' Having gathered together so much mud, you poured it over me, though I had done you no harm.
δοκεῖς δέ μοι μήτε φίλον τινὰ ἢ οἰκεῖον ἢ εὔνουν ἔχειν μήτε ἀνδρὶ ἐλευθέρῳ πώποτε καὶ παρρησίαν ἄγοντι ἐντετυχηκέναι, ὃς τἀληθὲς εἰπὼν ἔπαυσεν ἄν σε ὑδέρῳ μὲν ἐχόμενον καὶ ὑπὸ τοῦ πάθους διαρραγῆναι κινδυνεύοντα, σαυτῷ δὲ εὔσαρκον εἶναι δοκοῦντα καὶ εὐρωστίαν οἰόμενον τὴν συμφορὰν καὶ ὑπὸ μὲν τῶν ἀνοήτων ἐπαινούμενον ἀγνοούντων ἃ πάσχεις, ὑπὸ δὲ τῶν πεπαιδευμένων εἰκότως ἐλεούμενον.
And you seem to me to have neither friend nor kinsman nor well-wisher, nor ever to have met a free and outspoken man who, by telling you the truth, would have stopped you, you who are possessed by dropsy and in danger of bursting from the disease, yet seeming to yourself to be in good flesh and thinking your misfortune to be strength, praised by the foolish who are ignorant of what you suffer, but naturally pitied by the educated."