§1Λυκῖνος
Λεξιφάνης ὁ καλὸς μετὰ βιβλίου;
Lycinus The beautiful Lexiphanes with a book?
Λεξιφάνης
νὴ Δίʼ, ὦ Λυκῖνε, γράμμα ἐστὶν τητινόν τι τῶν ἐμῶν κομιδῇ νεοχμόν.
Lexiphanes Yes, by Zeus, Lycinus! It is a writing of this year, one of mine, quite novel.
Λυκῖνος
ἤδη γάρ τι καὶ περὶ αὐχμῶν ἡμῖν γράφεις;
Lycinus Why, are you already writing something for us about droughts?
Λεξιφάνης
οὐ δῆτα, οὐδὲ αὐχμὸν εἶπον, ἀλλὰ ὥρα σοι τὸ ἀρτιγραφὲς οὕτω καλεῖν.
Lexiphanes Not at all! I didn't say "drought", but it is time for you to call what is newly written in this way.
σὺ δὲ κυψελόβυστα ἔοικας ἔχειν τὰ ὦτα.
You seem to have ears plugged with wax.
Λυκῖνος
σύγγνωθι, ὦ ἑταῖρε· πολὺ γὰρ τοῦ αὐχμοῦ τὸ νεοχμὸν μετέχει.
Lycinus Forgive me, my friend; for "novelty" has much in common with "drought".
ἀλλʼ εἰπέ μοι, τίς ὁ νοῦς τῷ συγγράμματι;
But tell me, what is the meaning of your treatise?
Λεξιφάνης
ἀντισυμποσιάζω τῷ Ἀρίστωνος ἐν αὐτῷ.
Lexiphanes I hold a counter-symposium against the son of Ariston in it.
Λυκῖνος
πολλοὶ μὲν οἱ Ἀρίστωνες· σὺ δὲ ὅσον ἀπὸ τοῦ συμποσίου τὸν Πλάτωνά μοι ἔδοξας λέγειν.
Lycinus There are many Aristons; but you, to judge from the "symposium", seem to me to mean Plato.
Λεξιφάνης
ὀρθῶς ἀνέγνως.
Lexiphanes You have read me correctly.
τὸ δὲ λεγόμενον ὡς ἄλλῳ παντὶ ἀνόητον ἂν ἦν.
What is said would have been incomprehensible to anyone else.
Λυκῖνος
οὐκοῦν ὀλίγα μοι αὐτοῦ ἀνάγνωθι τοῦ βιβλίου, ὅπως μὴ παντάπασιν ἀπολειποίμην τῆς ἑστιάσεως·
Lycinus Won't you then read me a little from the book itself, so that I may not be altogether left out of the feast?
νέκταρος γάρ τινος ἔοικας οἰνοχοήσειν ἡμῖν ἀπʼ αὐτοῦ.
For you seem to be about to pour out for us some nectar from it.
Λεξιφάνης
τὸν μὲν εἴρωνα πεδοῖ κατάβαλε· σὺ δὲ εὔπορα ποιήσας τὰ ὦτα ἤδη ἄκουε.
Lexiphanes Put aside your irony on the ground; and having made your ears wide open, listen now.
ἀπέστω δὲ ἡ ἐπιβύστρα ἡ Κυψελίς.
Let the plug of Cypselus be far away!
Λυκῖνος
λέγε θαρρῶν, ὡς ἔμοιγε οὔτε Κύψελός τις οὔτε Περίανδρος ἐν τοῖς ὠσὶν κάθηται.
Lycinus Speak boldly, for as far as I am concerned, neither any Cypselus nor Periander is sitting in my ears.
Λεξιφάνης
σκόπει δὴ μεταξύ, ὅπως διαπεραίνομαι, ὦ Λυκῖνε, τὸν λόγον, εἰ εὔαρχός τέ ἐστι καὶ πολλὴν τὴν εὐλογίαν ἐπιδεικνύμενος καὶ εὔλεξις, ἔτι δὲ εὐώνυμος.
Lexiphanes Observe then meanwhile, Lycinus, how I carry through my discourse, whether it is well-begun, showing much beautiful language, and elegant in expression, and moreover auspicious in name.
Λυκῖνος
ἔοικε τοιοῦτος εἶναι σός γε ὤν.
Lycinus It is likely to be such, since indeed it is yours.
ἀλλʼ ἄρξαι ποτέ.
But do begin at last.
§2Λεξιφάνης
εἶτα δειπνήσομεν,
ἦ δ’ ὃς ὁ Καλλικλῆς,
εἶτα τὸ δειλινὸν περιδινησόμεθα ἐν Λυκείῳ, νῦν δὲ ἤδη καιρός ἐστιν χρίεσθαι τὸ ἡλιοκαὲς καὶ πρὸς τὴν εἵλην θέρεσθαι καὶ λουσαμένους ἀρτοσιτεῖν· καὶ ἤδη γε ἀπιτητέα.
Lexiphanes "Then we shall dine," said Callicles, "then in the evening we shall stroll around in the Lyceum, but now indeed it is time to anoint our sunburnt skin and to warm ourselves in the sun heat, and having bathed, to eat bread; and indeed we must go now.
σὺ δέ, ὦ παῖ, στλεγγίδα μοι καὶ βύρσαν καὶ φωσώνια καὶ ῥύμματα ναυστολεῖν ἐς τὸ βαλανεῖον καὶ τοὐπίλουτρον κομίζειν· ἔχεις δὲ χαμᾶζε παρὰ τὴν ἐγγυοθήκην δύʼ ὀβολώ.
And you, boy, bring my strigil, leather bag, towels, and soap to the bath, and bring the bathing fee; you have two obols on the ground by the chest.
σὺ δὲ τί καὶ πράξεις, ὦ Λεξίφανες, ἥξεις ἢ ἐλινύσεις ἔτι αὐτόθι;
And you, what will you do, Lexiphanes?
κἀγώ,
ἦν δὲ ἐγώ,
τρίπαλαι λουτιῶ· οὐκ εὐπόρως τε γὰρ ἔχω καὶ τὰ ἀμφὶ τὴν τράμιν μαλακίζομαι ἐπʼ ἀστράβης ὀχηθείς.
Will you come, or will you still linger here?" And I, said I, "have been wanting to bathe for ages; for I am not in a comfortable state, and I am sore in the parts around my perineum, having ridden on a pack-saddle.
ὁ γὰρ ἀστραβηλάτης ἐπέσπερχεν καίτοι ἀσκωλιάζων αὐτός.
For the mule-driver was hurrying me on, though he himself was limping.
ἀλλὰ καὶ ἐν αὐτῷ οὐκ ἀκμὴς ἦν τῷ ἀγρῷ· κατέλαβον γὰρ τοὺς ἐργάτας λιγυρίζοντας τὴν θερινὴν ᾠδήν, τοὺς δὲ τάφον τῷ ἐμῷ πατρὶ κατασκευάζοντας.
But even in the field itself I was not idle; for I found the laborers singing clearly their summer song, and others constructing a tomb for my father.
συντυμβωρυχήσας οὖν αὐτοῖς καὶ τοῖς ἀναχοῦσιν τὰ ἄνδηρα καὶ αὐτὸς ὀλίγα συγχειροπονήσας ἐκείνους μὲν διαφῆκα τοῦ τε κρύους ἕνεκα καὶ ὅτι καύματα ἦν· οἶσθα δὲ ὡς ἐν κρύει σφοδρῷ γίνεται τὰ καύματα.
So, having helped them dig the grave and having worked a little myself with those raising up the dikes, I dismissed them because of the cold and because there was burning heat—you know how burning heat occurs in severe cold.
ἐγὼ δὲ περιελθὼν τὰ ἀρώματα σκόροδά τε εὗρον ἐν αὐτοῖς πεφυκότα καὶ γηπαττάλους τινὰς ἀνορύξας καὶ τῶν σκανδίκων καὶ βρακάνων λαχανευσάμενος, ἔτι δὲ κάχρυς πριάμενος — οὔπω δὲ οἱ λειμῶνες ἀνθοσμίαι ἦσαν, ὡς αὐτοποδητὶ βαδίζειν — ἀνατεθεὶς ἐπὶ τὴν ἀστράβην ἐδάρην τὸν ὄρρον· καὶ νῦν βαδίζω τε ὀδυνηρῶς καὶ ἰδίω θαμὰ καὶ μαλακιῶ τὸ σῶμα καὶ δέομαι διανεῦσαι ἐν τῷ ὕδατι ἐπὶ πλεῖστον· χαίρω δὲ μετὰ κάματον ἀπολούμενος. §3Λεξιφάνης
ἀποθρέξομαι οὖν καὶ αὐτὸς ὡς τὸν παῖδα, ὃν εἰκὸς ἢ παρὰ τῇ λεκιθοπώλιδι ἢ παρὰ τῷ γρυμαιοπώλῃ με περιμένειν·
And I, having gone around the plowed fields, found garlic growing in them, and having dug up some wild carrots and gathered wild chervils and wild herbs, and moreover having bought parched barley—for the meadows were not yet sweet-smelling with flowers, so as to walk barefoot—being placed upon the saddle, I got my rump skinned; and now I walk painfully, and sweat frequently, and feel weak in body, and need to swim in the water for a very long time; and I enjoy washing myself after labor." Lexiphanes "I shall run off myself, then, to my slave, who is likely to be waiting for me either by the porridge-seller woman or by the junk-dealer; although he had been ordered beforehand to meet me at the sweetmeats.
καίτοι προηγόρευτο αὐτῷ ἐπὶ τὰ γέλγη ἀπαντᾶν. ἀλλʼ εἰς καιρὸν οὑτοσὶ αὐτὸς ἐμπολήσας γε, ὡς ὁρῶ, πυριάτην τέ τινα καὶ ἐγκρυφίας καὶ γήτεια καὶ φύκας καὶ οἶβον τουτονὶ καὶ λωγάνιον καὶ τοῦ βοὸς τὸ πολύπτυχον ἔγκατον καὶ φώκτας.
But, just in time, here he is himself, having bought, as I see, some beestings-pudding, ash-baked bread, leeks, seaweeds, this piece of tripe, dewlap, the many-folded gut of an ox, and toasted cakes.
εὖ γε, ὦ Ἀττικίων, ὅτι μοι ἄβατον ἐποίησας τὸ πολὺ τῆς ὁδοῦ.
Well done, Attic-boy, that you have made the greater part of my way untrodden.
ἐγὼ δέ,
ἦ δʼ ὅς,
σίλλος, ὦ δέσποτα, γεγένημαι σὲ περιορῶν.
And I," said he, "have become a squint-eyed fool, master, looking around for you.
σὺ δὲ ποῦ χθὲς ἐδείπνεις;
Where did you dine yesterday?
μῶν παρὰ Ὀνομακρίτῳ; οὔ, μὰ Δίʼ. ἦν δʼ ἐγώ,
ἀλλʼ ἀγρόνδε ᾠχόμην ψύττα κατατείνας· οἶσθα δὲ ὡς φίλαγρός εἰμι.
Surely not at Onomacritus'?" "No, by Zeus," said I, "but I went off to the country, urging the horse on; you know how fond of the country I am.
ὑμεῖς δὲ ἴσως ᾤεσθέ με λαταγεῖν κοττάβους.
Perhaps you thought I was splashing wine-drops in cottabus.
ἀλλʼ εἰσιὼν ταῦτά τε καὶ τὰ ἄλλα ἡδύνειν καὶ τὴν κάρδοπον σμῆν, ὡς θριδακίνας μάττοιτε ἡμῖν.
But go in, and season these and the other things, and wipe the kneading-trough, so that you may knead lettuce-bread for us."