But teach me the other of your two arguments, the one that pays back nothing.
And whatever reward you might exact from me, I swear to you by the gods to pay it in full. What kind of gods will you swear by?
For first of all, gods are not a current coin for us. By what then do you swear?
ἢ §249σιδαρέοισιν ὥσπερ ἐν Βυζαντίῳ; §250βούλει τὰ θεῖα πράγματʼ εἰδέναι σαφῶς §251ἅττʼ ἐστὶν ὀρθῶς; §251bνὴ Δίʼ εἴπερ ἔστι γε. §252καὶ ξυγγενέσθαι ταῖς Νεφέλαισιν ἐς λόγους, §253ταῖς ἡμετέραισι δαίμοσιν; §253bμάλιστά γε. §254κάθιζε τοίνυν ἐπὶ τὸν ἱερὸν σκίμποδα. §255ἰδοὺ κάθημαι. §255bτουτονὶ τοίνυν λαβὲ §256τὸν στέφανον. §256bἐπὶ τί στέφανον;
Or by iron ones, as in Byzantium? Do you wish to know clearly about divine matters, what they truly are? Yes, by Zeus, if indeed they exist. And to hold converse with the Clouds, our deities? Most certainly. Sit down then upon the sacred pallet. There, I am sitting. Take this wreath then. What is a wreath for?
οἴμοι Σώκρατες §257ὥσπερ με τὸν Ἀθάμανθʼ ὅπως μὴ θύσετε. §258οὔκ, ἀλλὰ ταῦτα πάντα τοὺς τελουμένους §259ἡμεῖς ποιοῦμεν. §259bεἶτα δὴ τί κερδανῶ; §260λέγειν γενήσει τρῖμμα κρόταλον παιπάλη. §261ἀλλʼ ἔχʼ ἀτρεμί. §261bμὰ τὸν Δίʼ οὐ ψεύσει γέ με· §262καταπαττόμενος γὰρ παιπάλη γενήσομαι. §263εὐφημεῖν χρὴ τὸν πρεσβύτην καὶ τῆς εὐχῆς ἐπακούειν. §264ὦ δέσποτʼ ἄναξ ἀμέτρητʼ Ἀήρ, ὃς ἔχεις τὴν γῆν μετέωρον, §265λαμπρός τʼ Αἰθὴρ σεμναί τε θεαὶ Νεφέλαι βροντησικέραυνοι, §266ἄρθητε φάνητʼ ὦ δέσποιναι τῷ φροντιστῇ μετέωροι. §267μήπω μήπω γε πρὶν ἂν τουτὶ πτύξωμαι, μὴ καταβρεχθῶ. §268τὸ δὲ μηδὲ κυνῆν οἴκοθεν ἐλθεῖν ἐμὲ τὸν κακοδαίμονʼ ἔχοντα. §269ἔλθετε δῆτʼ ὦ πολυτίμητοι Νεφέλαι τῷδʼ εἰς ἐπίδειξιν· §270εἴτʼ ἐπʼ Ὀλύμπου κορυφαῖς ἱεραῖς χιονοβλήτοισι κάθησθε, §271εἴτʼ Ὠκεανοῦ πατρὸς ἐν κήποις ἱερὸν χορὸν ἵστατε Νύμφαις, §272εἴτʼ ἄρα Νείλου προχοαῖς ὑδάτων χρυσέαις ἀρύτεσθε πρόχοισιν, §273ἢ Μαιῶτιν λίμνην ἔχετʼ ἢ σκόπελον νιφόεντα Μίμαντος· §274ὑπακούσατε δεξάμεναι θυσίαν καὶ τοῖς ἱεροῖσι χαρεῖσαι. §275ἀέναοι Νεφέλαι §276ἀρθῶμεν φανεραὶ δροσερὰν φύσιν εὐάγητον, §277πατρὸς ἀπʼ Ὠκεανοῦ βαρυαχέος §278ὑψηλῶν ὀρέων κορυφὰς ἐπὶ §280δενδροκόμους, ἵνα §281τηλεφανεῖς σκοπιὰς ἀφορώμεθα, §282καρπούς τʼ ἀρδομέναν ἱερὰν χθόνα, §283καὶ ποταμῶν ζαθέων κελαδήματα, §284καὶ πόντον κελάδοντα βαρύβρομον· §285ὄμμα γὰρ αἰθέρος ἀκάματον σελαγεῖται §286μαρμαρέαις ἐν αὐγαῖς. §287ἀλλʼ ἀποσεισάμεναι νέφος ὄμβριον §288ἀθανάτας ἰδέας ἐπιδώμεθα §290τηλεσκόπῳ ὄμματι γαῖαν. §291ὦ μέγα σεμναὶ Νεφέλαι φανερῶς ἠκούσατέ μου καλέσαντος. §292ᾔσθου φωνῆς ἅμα καὶ βροντῆς μυκησαμένης θεοσέπτου; §293καὶ σέβομαί γʼ ὦ πολυτίμητοι καὶ βούλομαι ἀνταποπαρδεῖν §294πρὸς τὰς βροντάς· οὕτως αὐτὰς τετρεμαίνω καὶ πεφόβημαι· §295κεἰ θέμις ἐστίν, νυνί γʼ ἤδη, κεἰ μὴ θέμις ἐστί, χεσείω. §296οὐ μὴ σκώψει μηδὲ ποιήσεις ἅπερ οἱ τρυγοδαίμονες οὗτοι, §297ἀλλʼ εὐφήμει· μέγα γάρ τι θεῶν κινεῖται σμῆνος ἀοιδαῖς. §298παρθένοι ὀμβροφόροι §300ἔλθωμεν λιπαρὰν χθόνα Παλλάδος, εὔανδρον γᾶν §301Κέκροπος ὀψόμεναι πολυήρατον· §302οὗ σέβας ἀρρήτων ἱερῶν, ἵνα §303μυστοδόκος δόμος §304ἐν τελεταῖς ἁγίαις ἀναδείκνυται, §305οὐρανίοις τε θεοῖς δωρήματα, §306ναοί θʼ ὑψερεφεῖς καὶ ἀγάλματα, §307καὶ πρόσοδοι μακάρων ἱερώταται, §308εὐστέφανοί τε θεῶν θυσίαι θαλίαι τε, §310παντοδαπαῖς ἐν ὥραις, §311ἦρί τʼ ἐπερχομένῳ Βρομία χάρις, §312εὐκελάδων τε χορῶν ἐρεθίσματα, §313καὶ μοῦσα βαρύβρομος αὐλῶν.
Ah, Socrates, see that you don't sacrifice me like Athamas! No, but we do all these things to those being initiated. Then indeed what will I gain? In speaking you will become a smooth talker, a rattle, fine flour. But keep still. By Zeus, you won't deceive me; for by being sprinkled, I shall indeed become fine flour! The old man must observe a sacred silence and listen to the prayer. O Lord and Master, boundless Air, who holdest the earth suspended aloft, and bright Ether, and august goddesses Clouds of thunder and lightning, arise and appear, O Sovereign Mistresses, aloft to the thinker! Not yet, not yet, at least until I wrap this around me, so that I don't get drenched. To think that I, miserable wretch, came from home without even bringing a cap! Come then, highly honored Clouds, to show yourselves to this man; whether you sit on the sacred, snow-swept peaks of Olympus, or in the gardens of father Ocean you set up a sacred dance with the Nymphs, or draw up the streams of the Nile in golden pitchers, or hold Lake Maeotis or the snowy peak of Mimas; hearken, receiving our sacrifice, and rejoicing in these holy rites. Ever-flowing Clouds, let us arise, visible in our dewy, bright nature, from father Ocean the deep-roaring, to the tree-clad peaks of the high mountains, so that we may look out upon the far-visible watchtowers, and the sacred earth watering the fruits, and the rushings of divine rivers, and the echoing, deep-roaring sea; for the untiring eye of Ether gleams in flashing rays. But shaking off the rainy cloud from our immortal forms, let us look upon the earth with far-seeing eye. O greatly august Clouds, you have clearly heard me calling. Did you hear their voice, and at the same time the roar of divine thunder? Indeed I revere you, highly honored ones, and I want to fart back in response to the thunder; so much do I tremble before them and am terrified. And whether it is permitted, right now, or whether it is not, I must crap! Do not mock nor do what those comedy-writers do, but keep sacred silence; for a great swarm of goddesses is being stirred by songs. Rain-bearing maidens, let us go to the shiny land of Pallas, to look upon the lovely, populous land of Cecrops; where there is reverence for unspeakable mysteries, where the hall that receives the initiates is revealed in holy rites, and gifts to the heavenly gods, high-roofed temples and statues, and most sacred processions of the blessed ones, and well-garlanded sacrifices and feasts for the gods, in all seasons, and with the coming of spring, the grace of Bromios, and the stirrings of sweet-sounding choruses, and the deep-sounding music of flutes. By Zeus I entreat you, tell me, Socrates, who are these who uttered this solemn song?
§314πρὸς τοῦ Διὸς ἀντιβολῶ σε φράσον, τίνες εἴσʼ ὦ Σώκρατες αὗται §315αἱ φθεγξάμεναι τοῦτο τὸ σεμνόν; μῶν ἡρῷναί τινές εἰσιν; §316ἥκιστʼ ἀλλʼ οὐράνιαι Νεφέλαι μεγάλαι θεαὶ ἀνδράσιν ἀργοῖς· §317αἵπερ γνώμην καὶ διάλεξιν καὶ νοῦν ἡμῖν παρέχουσιν §318καὶ τερατείαν καὶ περίλεξιν καὶ κροῦσιν καὶ κατάληψιν. §319ταῦτʼ ἄρʼ ἀκούσασʼ αὐτῶν τὸ φθέγμʼ ἡ ψυχή μου πεπότηται, §320καὶ λεπτολογεῖν ἤδη ζητεῖ καὶ περὶ καπνοῦ στενολεσχεῖν, §321καὶ γνωμιδίῳ γνώμην νύξασʼ ἑτέρῳ λόγῳ ἀντιλογῆσαι· §322ὥστʼ εἴ πως ἔστιν ἰδεῖν αὐτὰς ἤδη φανερῶς ἐπιθυμῶ.
Are they perchance some heroines? Not at all, but heavenly Clouds, great goddesses for idle men; who provide us with judgment, dialectic, mind, and charlatanry, circumlocution, verbal sparring, and comprehension. Therefore, having heard their voice, my soul has taken wing, and already seeks to split hairs and chatter subtly about smoke, and having pricked a maxim with another maxim, to counter-argue with another statement; so that, if it is somehow possible, I already desire to see them clearly. Look then over here toward Parnes; for already I see them coming down quietly. Come, where?
§323βλέπε νυν δευρὶ πρὸς τὴν Πάρνηθʼ· ἤδη γὰρ ὁρῶ κατιούσας §324ἡσυχῇ αὐτάς. §324bφέρε ποῦ; δεῖξον. §324cχωροῦσʼ αὗται πάνυ πολλαὶ §325διὰ τῶν κοίλων καὶ τῶν δασέων, αὗται πλάγιαι. §325bτί τὸ χρῆμα; §326ὡς οὐ καθορῶ. §326bπαρὰ τὴν εἴσοδον. §326cἤδη νυνὶ μόλις οὕτως.
Show me. Here they come, very many, through the hollows and the thickets, here, slantwise. What is the matter? I don't see them. Along the entrance. Ah, now at last, barely like this.