§351ὁ λάρκος ἐνετίλησεν ὥσπερ σηπία. §352δεινὸν γὰρ οὕτως ὀμφακίαν πεφυκέναι §353τὸν θυμὸν ἀνδρῶν ὥστε βάλλειν καὶ βοᾶν §354ἐθέλειν τʼ ἀκοῦσαι μηδὲν ἴσον ἴσῳ φέρον, §355ἐμοῦ ʼθέλοντος ὑπὲρ ἐπιξήνου λέγειν §356ὑπὲρ Λακεδαιμονίων ἅπανθʼ ὅσʼ ἂν λέγω· §357καίτοι φιλῶ γε τὴν ἐμὴν ψυχὴν ἐγώ. §358τί οὖν οὐ λέγεις, ἐπίξηνον ἐξενεγκὼν θύραζʼ, §360ὅ τι ποτʼ ὦ σχέτλιε τὸ μέγα τοῦτʼ ἔχεις; §363πάνυ γὰρ ἔμεγε πόθος ὅ τι φρονεῖς ἔχει. §364ἀλλʼ ᾗπερ αὐτὸς τὴν δίκην διωρίσω, §365θεὶς δεῦρο τοὐπίξηνον ἐγχείρει λέγειν. §366ἰδοὺ θεᾶσθε, τὸ μὲν ἐπίξηνον τοδί,
The coal-basket squirted soot like a cuttlefish.\n For it is a terrible thing that the temper of men has grown so sour like unripe grapes,\n so that they throw stones and shout\n and are willing to hear nothing on equal terms,\n while I am willing to speak with my head over a chopping-block\n on behalf of the Lacedaemonians about all that I may say;\n and yet I love my own life.\n Chorus: Why then do you not speak, bringing out a chopping-block,\n whatever great plan you have, O wretched man?\n For a great desire holds me to know what you are thinking.\n But in the very way you yourself defined the terms,\n place the chopping-block here and proceed to speak.\n Dicaeopolis: Look, behold!
§367ὁ δʼ ἀνὴρ ὁ λέξων οὑτοσὶ τυννουτοσί. §368ἀμέλει μὰ τὸν Δίʼ οὐκ ἐνασπιδώσομαι, §369λέξω δʼ ὑπὲρ Λακεδαιμονίων ἅ μοι δοκεῖ. §370καίτοι δέδοικα πολλά· τούς τε γὰρ τρόπους §371τοὺς τῶν ἀγροίκων οἶδα χαίροντας σφόδρα, §372ἐάν τις αὐτοὺς εὐλογῇ καὶ τὴν πόλιν §373ἀνὴρ ἀλαζὼν καὶ δίκαια κἄδικα· §374κἀνταῦθα λανθάνουσʼ ἀπεμπολώμενοι· §375τῶν τʼ αὖ γερόντων οἶδα τὰς ψυχὰς ὅτι §376οὐδὲν βλέπουσιν ἄλλο πλὴν ψηφηδακεῖν. §377αὐτός τʼ ἐμαυτὸν ὑπὸ Κλέωνος ἅπαθον §378ἐπίσταμαι διὰ τὴν πέρυσι κωμῳδίαν. §379εἰσελκύσας γάρ μʼ ἐς τὸ βουλευτήριον §380διέβαλλε καὶ ψευδῆ κατεγλώττιζέ μου §381κἀκυκλοβόρει κἄπλυνεν, ὥστʼ ὀλίγου πάνυ §382ἀπωλόμην μολυνοπραγμονούμενος. §383νῦν οὖν με πρῶτον πρὶν λέγειν ἐάσατε §384ἐνσκευάσασθαί μʼ οἷον ἀθλιώτατον. §385τί ταῦτα στρέφει τεχνάζεις τε καὶ πορίζεις τριβάς; §386λαβὲ δʼ ἐμοῦ γʼ ἓνεκα παρʼ Ἱερωνύμου §390σκοτοδασυπυκνότριχά τινʼ Ἄιδος κυνῆν· §391ἀλλʼ ἐξάνοιγε μηχανὰς τὰς Σισύφου, §392ὡς σκῆψιν ἁγὼν οὗτος οὐκ ἐσδέξεται. §393ὥρα ʼστὶν ἤδη καρτερὰν ψυχὴν λαβεῖν, §394καί μοι βαδιστέʼ ἐστὶν ὡς Εὐριπίδην. §395παῖ παῖ. §395bτίς οὗτος, §395cἔνδον ἔστʼ Εὐριπίδης; §396οὐκ ἔνδον ἔνδον ἐστίν, εἰ γνώμην ἔχεις. §397πῶς ἔνδον εἶτʼ οὐκ ἔνδον; §397bὀρθῶς ὦ γέρον. §398ὁ νοῦς μὲν ἔξω ξυλλέγων ἐπύλλια §399οὐκ ἔνδον, αὐτὸς δʼ ἔνδον ἀναβάδην ποιεῖ §400τραγῳδίαν. §400bὦ τρισμακάριʼ Εὐριπίδη, §401ὅθʼ ὁ δοῦλος οὑτωσὶ σαφῶς ἀπεκρίνατο. §402ἐκκάλεσον αὐτόν. §402bἀλλʼ ἀδύνατον. §402cἀλλʼ ὅμως· §403οὐ γὰρ ἂν ἀπέλθοιμʼ, ἀλλὰ κόψω τὴν θύραν. §404Εὐριπίδη, Εὐριπίδιον, §405ὑπάκουσον, εἴπερ τώποτʼ ἀνθρώπων τινί· §406Δικαιόπολις καλεῖ σε Χολλῄδης, ἐγώ. §407ἀλλʼ οὐ σχολή. §408ἀλλʼ ἐκκυκλήθητʼ. §408bἀλλʼ ἀδύνατον. §408cἀλλʼ ὅμως. §409ἀλλʼ ἐκκυκλήσομαι· καταβαίνειν δʼ οὐ σχολή. §410Εὐριπίδη, §410bτί λέλακας; §410cἀναβάδην ποιεῖς, §411ἐξὸν καταβάδην; οὐκ ἐτὸς χωλοὺς ποιεῖς. §412ἀτὰρ τί τὰ ῥάκιʼ ἐκ τραγῳδίας ἔχεις, §413ἐσθῆτʼ ἐλεινήν;
Here is the chopping-block,\n and here is the man who is going to speak, as tiny as this.\n Never mind, by Zeus, I will not cover myself with a shield,\n but I will speak on behalf of the Lacedaemonians what seems best to me.\n And yet I fear many things; for I know the ways\n of the rustics, how they rejoice greatly\n if some boastful man praises them and the city,\n whether justly or unjustly;\n and there they do not realize they are being sold out.\n And again, I know the minds of the old men, that\n they look for nothing else than to bite with their voting-pebbles.\n And I know what I myself suffered at the hands of Cleon\n because of last year's comedy.\n For dragging me into the Council chamber,\n he slandered me and tongue-lashed me with falsehoods,\n and bellowed like a torrent and washed me, so that I\n almost perished, getting tangled in his muddy business.\n Now, therefore, first before I speak, allow me\n to dress myself up as wretchedly as possible.\n Chorus: Why do you twist and scheme and devise delays?\n Take, as far as I am concerned, from Hieronymus\n some dark-shaggy-thick-haired helmet of Hades;\n but open up all the tricks of Sisyphus,\n since this contest will not admit any excuse.\n Dicaeopolis: It is time now to take a brave heart,\n and I must make my way to Euripides.\n Boy! Boy!\n Servant: Who is this?\n Dicaeopolis: Is Euripides inside?\n Servant: He is not inside, and is inside, if you have understanding.\n Dicaeopolis: How can he be inside and not inside?\n Servant: Correctly, old man.\n His mind indeed is outside collecting little verses,\n not inside, but he himself is inside, writing tragedy\n with his legs up.\n Dicaeopolis: O thrice-blessed Euripides,\n when your servant answers so clearly.\n Call him out.\n Servant: But it is impossible.\n Dicaeopolis: But nevertheless!\n For I will not go away, but will knock at the door.\n Euripides, little Euripides,\n listen to me, if ever you did to any human being;\n Dicaeopolis of Cholleis calls you, I.\n Euripides: But I have no leisure.\n Dicaeopolis: But be wheeled out on the eccyclema.\n Euripides: But it is impossible.\n Dicaeopolis: But nevertheless.\n Euripides: Well, I will be wheeled out; but I have no leisure to come down.\n Dicaeopolis: Euripides!\n Euripides: Why did you shout?\n Dicaeopolis: You write with your legs up,\n when you could do so down? No wonder you make lame characters.\n And why do you have rags from tragedy,\n pitiful clothing?
οὐκ ἐτὸς πτωχοὺς ποιεῖς. §414ἀλλʼ ἀντιβολῶ πρὸς τῶν γονάτων σʼ Εὐριπίδη, §415δός μοι ῥάκιόν τι τοῦ παλαιοῦ δράματος. §416δεῖ γάρ με λέξαι τῷ χορῷ ῥῆσιν μακράν· §417αὕτη δὲ θάνατον, ἢν κακῶς λέξω, φέρει. §418τὰ ποῖα τρύχη;
No wonder you make beggars.\n But I entreat you by your knees, Euripides,\n give me some rag from an old play.\n For I must speak a long speech to the Chorus;\n and this brings death if I do not speak well.\n Euripides: What rags?
μῶν ἐν οἷς Οἰνεὺς ὁδὶ §419ὁ δύσποτμος γεραιὸς ἠγωνίζετο; §420οὐκ Οἰνέως ἦν, ἀλλʼ ἔτʼ ἀθλιωτέρου. §421τὰ τοῦ τυφλοῦ Φοίνικος; §421bοὐ Φοίνικος, οὔ· §422ἀλλʼ ἕτερος ἦν Φοίνικος ἀθλιώτερος. §423ποίας ποθʼ ἁνὴρ λακίδας αἰτεῖται πέπλων; §424ἀλλʼ ἦ Φιλοκτήτου τὰ τοῦ πτωχοῦ λέγεις; §425οὐκ ἀλλὰ τούτου πολὺ πολὺ πτωχιστέρου. §426ἀλλʼ ἦ τὰ δυσπινῆ ʼθέλεις πεπλώματα, §427ἃ Βελλεροφόντης εἶχʼ ὁ χωλὸς οὑτοσί; §428οὐ Βελλεροφόντης· ἀλλὰ κἀκεῖνος μὲν ἦν §429χωλὸς προσαιτῶν στωμύλος δεινὸς λέγειν. §430οἶδʼ ἄνδρα Μυσὸν Τήλεφον. §430bναὶ Τήλεφον· §431τούτου δὸς ἀντιβολῶ σέ μοι τὰ σπάργανα. §432ὦ παῖ δὸς αὐτῷ Τηλέφου ῥακώματα. §433κεῖται δʼ ἄνωθεν τῶν Θυεστείων ῥακῶν §434μεταξὺ τῶν Ἰνοῦς. §434bἰδοὺ ταυτὶ λαβέ. §435ὦ Ζεῦ διόπτα καὶ κατόπτα πανταχῇ, §436ἐνσκευάσασθαί μʼ οἷον ἀθλιώτατον. §437Εὐριπίδη, ʼπειδήπερ ἐχαρίσω ταδί, §438κἀκεῖνά μοι δὸς τἀκόλουθα τῶν ῥακῶν, §439τὸ πιλίδιον περὶ τὴν κεφαλὴν τὸ Μύσιον. §440δεῖ γάρ με δόξαι πτωχὸν εἶναι τήμερον, §441εἶναι μὲν ὅσπερ εἰμί, φαίνεσθαι δὲ μή· §442τοὺς μὲν θεατὰς εἰδέναι μʼ ὃς εἴμʼ ἐγώ,
Surely not those in which wretched old\n Oeneus struggled here?\n Dicaeopolis: Not of Oeneus, but of someone still more wretched.\n Euripides: Those of blind Phoenix?\n Dicaeopolis: Not of Phoenix, no;\n but another one more wretched than Phoenix.\n Euripides: What shreds of garments does the man ask for?\n Do you mean those of Philoctetes the beggar?\n Dicaeopolis: No, but of one much, much more beggarly than him.\n Euripides: Or do you want the filthy garments\n which Bellerophon, this lame one, had?\n Dicaeopolis: Not of Bellerophon; though he too indeed was\n lame, a beggar, talkative, and terrible at speaking.\n Euripides: I know the man: Telephus the Mysian.\n Dicaeopolis: Yes, Telephus!\n Give me, I entreat you, his swaddling clothes.\n Euripides: Boy, give him the rags of Telephus.\n They lie above the rags of Thyestes,\n between those of Ino.\n Servant: Here, take these.\n Dicaeopolis: O Zeus who sees through and looks down everywhere,\n let me dress myself up as wretchedly as possible.\n Euripides, since you granted me these,\n give me also the things that go with the rags,\n the little Mysian cap for my head.\n For today I must seem to be a beggar,\n to be indeed who I am, but not to appear so;\n so that the spectators know who I am,