§38Biennio continuo post adeptum imperium pedem porta non extulit;
For two continuous years after obtaining power, he did not set foot outside the gate.
sequenti tempore praeterquam in propinqua oppida et, cum longissime, Antio tenus nusquam afuit, idque perraro et paucos dies; quamuis prouincias quoque et exercitus reuisurum se saepe pronuntiasset et prope quotannis profectionem praepararet, uehiculis comprehensis, commeatibus per municipia et colonias dispositis, ad extremum uota pro itu et reditu suo suscipi passus, ut uulgo iam per iocum 'Callippides' uocaretur, quem cursitare ac ne cubiti quidem mensuram progredi prouerbio Graeco notatum est.
In the following period, he was nowhere absent except in nearby towns and, at the furthest, as far as Antium, and that very rarely and for a few days; although he had often announced that he would revisit the provinces and armies as well, and prepared a departure almost every year, with vehicles requisitioned and provisions distributed through municipal towns and colonies, and at last permitted vows to be undertaken for his going and return, so that he was now commonly called 'Callippides' in jest, a man noted in a Greek proverb as running about and not advancing even the measure of a cubit.
§39sed orbatus utroque filio, quorum Germanicus in Syria, Drusus Romae obierat, secessum Campaniae petit; constanti et opinione et sermone paene omnium quasi neque rediturus umquam et cito mortem etiam obiturus.
But having been bereaved of both sons, of whom Germanicus had died in Syria and Drusus in Rome, he sought the retirement of Campania, with a constant opinion and talk of almost everyone as if he would never return and was also soon to meet his death.
quod paulo minus utrumque euenit; nam neque Romam amplius rediit et paucos post dies iuxta Tarracinam in praetorio, cui Speluncae nomen est, incenante eo complura et ingentia saxa fortuito superne dilapsa sunt, multisque conuiuarum et ministrorum elisis praeter spem euasit.
Both of which came to pass within a narrow margin; for he neither returned to Rome any more, and a few days later near Terracina, in a villa called Speluncae, while he was dining, several huge rocks fell by chance from above, and though many of the guests and servants were crushed, he escaped beyond expectation.
§40Peragrata Campania, cum Capuae Capitolium, Nolae templum Augusti, quam causam profectionis praetenderat, dedicasset, Capreas se contulit, praecipue delectatus insula, quod uno paruoque litore adiretur, saepta undique praeruptis immensae altitudinis rupibus et profundo mari.
Having traversed Campania, when he had dedicated the Capitol at Capua and the temple of Augustus at Nola, which he had pretended as the pretext for his departure, he betook himself to Capri, being especially delighted with the island because it was approached by only one small beach, being shut in on all sides by rugged cliffs of immense height and deep sea.
statimque reuocante assidua obtestatione populo propter cladem, qua apud Fidenas supra uiginti hominum milia gladiatorio munere amphitheatri ruina perierant, transiit in continentem potestatemque omnibus adeundi sui fecit: tanto magis, quod urbe egrediens ne quis se interpellaret edixerat ac toto itinere adeuntis submouerat.
And immediately, when the people called him back with constant entreaty because of the disaster in which at Fidenae more than twenty thousand people had perished at a gladiatorial show by the collapse of the amphitheater, he crossed to the mainland and made himself accessible to all: all the more because, on leaving the city, he had issued an edict that no one should disturb him, and had removed those approaching him along the whole journey.
§41Regressus in insulam rei p. quidem curam usque adeo abiecit, ut postea non decurias equitum umquam supplerit, non tribunos militum praefectosque, non prouinciarum praesides ullos mutauerit, Hispaniam et Syriam per aliquot annos sine consularibus legatis habuerit, Armeniam a Parthis occupari, Moesiam a Dacis Sarmatisque, Gallias a Germanis uastari neglexerit: magno dedecore imperii nec minore discrimine.
Having returned to the island, he cast aside the care of public affairs to such an extent that thereafter he never filled up the decuries of knights, nor changed any military tribunes and prefects, nor any governors of provinces, and held Spain and Syria for several years without consular legates, and neglected Armenia being occupied by the Parthians, Moesia being devastated by the Dacians and Sarmatians, and the Gallic provinces by the Germans, with great disgrace to the empire and no less danger.
§42ceterum secreti licentiam nanctus et quasi ciuitatis oculis remotis, cuncta simul uitia male diu dissimulata tandem profudit: de quibus singillatim ab exordio referam.
But having obtained the freedom of retirement, and as if the eyes of the citizens were removed, he at last poured out all the vices together which he had poorly concealed for a long time; of which I will relate individually from the beginning.
in castris tiro etiam tum propter nimiam uini auiditatem pro Tiberio 'Biberius,' pro Claudio 'Caldius,' pro Nerone 'Mero' uocabatur.
Even as a recruit in the camp, on account of his excessive greed for wine, he was called 'Biberius' instead of Tiberius, 'Caldius' instead of Claudius, and 'Mero' instead of Nero.
postea princeps in ipsa publicorum morum correctione cum Pomponio Flacco et L. Pisone noctem continuumque biduum epulando potandoque consumpsit, quorum alteri Syriam prouinciam, alteri praefecturam urbis confestim detulit, codicillis quoque iucundissimos et omnium horarum amicos professus.
Later, as princeps, in the very midst of correcting public morals, he spent a night and a continuous two days feasting and drinking with Pomponius Flaccus and Lucius Piso, to one of whom he immediately gave the province of Syria, and to the other the prefecture of the city, declaring them in his letters to be the most pleasant friends for all hours.
Cestio Gallo, libidinoso ac prodigo seni, olim ab Augusto ignominia notato et a se ante paucos dies apud senatum increpito cenam ea lege condixit, ne quid ex consuetudine immutaret aut demeret, utque nudis puellis ministrantibus cenaretur.
To Cestius Gallus, a lustful and spendthrift old man, formerly marked with disgrace by Augustus and rebuked by himself a few days before in the senate, he accepted an invitation to dinner on the condition that he should alter or omit nothing from his usual custom, and that the dinner should be served by naked girls.
ignotissimum quaesturae candidatum nobilissimis anteposuit ob epotam in conuiuio propinante se uini amphoram.
He preferred a most obscure candidate for the quaestorship over the most noble men, because he drained an amphora of wine at a feast when Tiberius proposed a toast.
Asellio Sabino sestertia ducenta donauit pro dialogo, in quo boleti et ficedulae et ostreae et turdi certamen induxerat.
He gave Asellius Sabinus two hundred thousand sesterces for a dialogue in which he had introduced a contest between mushrooms, fig-peckers, oysters, and thrushes.
nouum denique officium instituit a uoluptatibus, praeposito equite R. T. Caesonio Prisco.
Finally, he instituted a new office for pleasures, putting the Roman knight Titus Caesonius Priscus in charge of it.
§43secessu uero Caprensi etiam sellaria excogitauit, sedem arcanarum libidinum, in quam undique conquisiti puellarum et exoletorum greges monstrosique concubitus repertores, quos spintrias appellabat, triplici serie conexi, in uicem incestarent coram ipso, ut aspectu deficientis libidines excitaret.
But in his retirement at Capri he even devised 'sellaria,' the seat of secret lusts, into which crowds of girls and male prostitutes gathered from all sides, and the inventors of monstrous couplings, whom he called 'spintriae,' linked in a triple chain, defiled each other in turn in his presence, so that he might excite his failing lusts by the sight.
cubicula plurifariam disposita tabellis ac sigillis lasciuissimarum picturarum et figurarum adornauit librisque Elephantidis instruxit, ne cui in opera edenda exemplar imperatae schemae deesset.
He adorned the bedrooms arranged in various places with tablets and small statues of the most lascivious pictures and figures, and furnished them with the books of Elephantis, lest anyone in performing the act should lack an example of the commanded posture.
in siluis quoque ac nemoribus passim Venerios locos commentus est prostantisque per antra et cauas rupes ex utriusque sexus pube Paniscorum et Nympharum habitu, quae palam iam et uulgo nomine insulae abutentes 'Caprineum' dictitabant.
In the woods and groves also, he devised places of Venus here and there, and had young people of both sexes prosting through caves and hollow rocks in the guise of Panisks and Nymphs, so that people now openly and commonly, abusing the name of the island, repeatedly called him 'Caprineus.'