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Ovid · The Loves §3.4.1-3.4.48

The Futility of Guarding a Wife and Praise of Indulgence

Passage 41 of 53 · Latin

Summary

The poet advises a harsh husband that guarding his wife is futile, as chastity cannot be forced and prohibition only fuels desire. Citing myths and everyday examples, he argues that behaving with urban sophistication and allowing her freedom will ultimately benefit the husband.

§3.4.1Dure vir, inposito tenerae custode puellae §3.4.2Nil agis; ingenio est quaeque tuenda suo.
Harsh husband, by placing a guard over your tender girl you accomplish nothing; each woman must be guarded by her own disposition.
§3.4.3Siqua metu dempto casta est, ea denique casta est; §3.4.4Quae, quia non liceat, non facit, illa facit!
If any woman is chaste when fear is removed, she indeed is chaste; she who does not do it because she is not allowed, does do it!
§3.4.5Ut iam servaris bene corpus, adultera mens est; §3.4.6Nec custodiri, ne velit, ulla potest.
Though you may now guard her body well, her mind is adulterous; and no woman can be guarded so that she does not wish to sin.
§3.4.7Nec corpus servare potes, licet omnia claudas; §3.4.8Omnibus exclusis intus adulter erit.
Nor can you guard her body, although you lock everything up; when everyone is shut out, the adulterer will be within.
§3.4.9Cui peccare licet, peccat minus; ipsa potestas §3.4.10Semina nequitiae languidiora facit.
He who is allowed to sin, sins less; the very power to do so makes the seeds of wickedness weaker.
§3.4.11Desine, crede mihi, vitia inritare vetando; §3.4.12Obsequio vinces aptius illa tuo.
Cease, believe me, to provoke vices by forbidding them; you will conquer them more fitly by your compliance.
§3.4.13Vidi ego nuper equum contra sua vincla tenacem §3.4.14Ore reluctanti fulminis ire modo; §3.4.15Constitit ut primum concessas sensit habenas §3.4.16Frenaque in effusa laxa iacere iuba!
I recently saw a horse, stubborn against his bonds, go like a thunderbolt with resisting mouth; he stopped as soon as he felt the reins given slack and the loose bit lying on his flowing mane!
§3.4.17Nitimur in vetitum semper cupimusque negata; §3.4.18Sic interdictis imminet aeger aquis.
We always strive for the forbidden and desire what is denied; thus the sick man hangs longingly over forbidden waters.
§3.4.19Centum fronte oculos, centum cervice gerebat §3.4.20Argus — et hos unus saepe fefellit Amor; §3.4.21In thalamum Danae ferro saxoque perennem §3.4.22Quae fuerat virgo tradita, mater erat; §3.4.23Penelope mansit, quamvis custode carebat, §3.4.24Inter tot iuvenes intemerata procos.
He carried a hundred eyes on his forehead, a hundred on his neck, Argus — and these, Love alone often deceived; Into a bedchamber everlasting with iron and stone, Danae, who had been delivered as a virgin, was a mother; Penelope remained, although she lacked a guard, undefiled among so many young suitors.
§3.4.25Quidquid servatur cupimus magis, ipsaque furem §3.4.26Cura vocat; pauci, quod sinit alter, amant.
Whatever is guarded, we desire more, and the very care calls the thief; few love what another allows.
§3.4.27Nec facie placet illa sua, sed amore mariti; §3.4.28Nescio quid, quod te ceperit, esse putant.
Nor does she please by her own face, but by the love of her husband; they think there is something or other that captured you.
§3.4.29Non proba fit, quam vir servat, sed adultera cara; §3.4.30Ipse timor pretium corpore maius habet.
She whom her husband guards does not become virtuous, but a precious adulteress; fear itself has a price greater than her body.
§3.4.31Indignere licet, iuvat inconcessa voluptas; §3.4.32Sola placet, 'timeo!' dicere siqua potest. §3.4.33Nec tamen ingenuam ius est servare puellam — §3.4.34Hic metus externae corpora gentis agat!
Though you may be indignant, forbidden pleasure delights; she alone pleases who can say, 'I am afraid!' And yet it is not right to guard a free-born girl — let this fear drive the bodies of foreign race!
§3.4.35Scilicet ut possit custos 'ego' dicere 'feci,' §3.4.36In laudem servi casta sit illa tui?
Doubtless, so that the guard can say 'I did it,' must she be chaste for the praise of your slave?
§3.4.37Rusticus est nimium, quem laedit adultera coniunx, §3.4.38Et notos mores non satis urbis habet §3.4.39In qua Martigenae non sunt sine crimine nati §3.4.40Romulus Iliades Iliadesque Remus.
Too rustic is he whom an adulterous wife hurts, and he does not sufficiently possess the known customs of the city, in which the sons of Mars were not born without crime, Romulus, son of Ilia, and Remus, son of Ilia.
§3.4.41Quo tibi formosam, si non nisi casta placebat?
For what purpose do you have a beautiful woman, if she only pleased you when chaste?
§3.4.42Non possunt ullis ista coire modis.
Those things cannot combine in any way.
§3.4.43Si sapis, indulge dominae vultusque severos §3.4.44Exue, nec rigidi iura tuere viri, §3.4.45Et cole quos dederit — multos dabit — uxor amicos.
If you are wise, indulge your mistress and cast off stern looks, and do not defend the rights of a rigid husband, and cultivate the friends whom your wife will give — she will give many.
§3.4.46Gratia sic minimo magna labore venit; §3.4.47Sic poteris iuvenum convivia semper inire §3.4.48Et, quae non dederis, multa videre domi.
Thus great favor comes with very little labor; thus you will always be able to enter the banquets of young men, and see many things at home which you did not give.

Notes

  1. §3.4.4quia non liceat — The subjunctive 'liceat' in the 'quia' clause expresses a subjective reason or assumption in the mind of the subject ('because it is allegedly not allowed') rather than an objective fact.
  2. §3.4.5Ut iam servaris — The phrase 'ut iam' followed by the subjunctive ('servaris', a syncopated form of the perfect subjunctive 'servaveris') introduces a concessive clause meaning 'even though' or 'granted that'.
  3. §3.4.31Indignere licet — The impersonal verb 'licet' is used with the present subjunctive 'indignere' (second-person singular of the deponent 'indignor', with the suffix '-re' instead of '-ris') to express concession ('although you may be indignant').
  4. §3.4.41Quo tibi — A combination of the interrogative adverb 'quo' (for what purpose, why) and the dative of interest/possession 'tibi', with the verb (such as 'habes') omitted, expressing a strong rhetorical question ('why do you keep a beautiful woman?').

Cite this passage

Ovid, The Loves §3.4.1-3.4.48. Humanitext Reader, https://reader.humanitext.ai/en/text/urn:cts:latinLit:phi0959.phi001.humanitext-lat2:3.4.1-3.4.48

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