§2.2.1Quae virtus et quanta, boni, sit vivere parvo §2.2.2— nec meus hic sermo est, sed quae praecepit Ofellus §2.2.3rusticus, abnormis sapiens crassaque Minerva; §2.2.4discite non inter lances mensasque nitentis, §2.2.5cum stupet insanis acies fulgoribus et cum §2.2.6adclinis falsis animus meliora recusat, §2.2.7verum hic inpransi mecum disquirite.
"What a great virtue it is, my good friends, to live on a little — and this discourse is not mine, but what Ofellus the rustic taught, a philosopher unschooled and of a coarse mother-wit; — learn this, not amid shining dishes and tables, when the eye is dazed by senseless splendors, and when the mind, inclined to false appearances, refuses better things, but discuss it here with me before dining.
cur hoc?
Why so?
§2.2.8dicam, si potero.
I will tell you, if I can.
male verum examinat omnis §2.2.9corruptus iudex.
Every corrupt judge examines the truth badly.
leporem sectatus equove §2.2.10lassus ab indomito vel, si Romana fatigat §2.2.11militia adsuetum Graecari — seu pila velox §2.2.12molliter austerum studio fallente laborem, §2.2.13seu te discus agit, pete cedentem aera disco: §2.2.14cum labor extuderit fastidia, siccus, inanis §2.2.15sperne cibum vilem; nisi Hymettia mella Falerno §2.2.16ne biberis diluta.
After hunting a hare, or tired out by an unbroken horse, or, if Roman military exercises fatigue you accustomed to Greek ways — whether the swift ball, with play gently cheating the harsh labor through your enthusiasm, or whether the discus drives you, strike the yielding air with the discus: when labor has driven away fastidiousness, when dry and hungry, spurn cheap food; do not drink unless it is Hymettian honey diluted with Falernian wine.
foris est promus, et atrum §2.2.17defendens piscis hiemat mare: cum sale panis §2.2.18latrantem stomachum bene leniet.
The steward is out, and the dark sea, defending its fish, is stormy; bread with salt will soothe your barking stomach well.
From where do you think, or how is this obtained? The supreme pleasure is not in the costly aroma, but in yourself.
tu pulmentaria quaere §2.2.21sudando: pinguem vitiis albumque neque ostrea §2.2.22nec scarus aut poterit peregrina iuvare lagois.
Seek your relish by sweating: neither oysters nor scar-fish nor foreign grouse can please one bloated and pale from excess.
§2.2.23vix tamen eripiam, posito pavone velis quin §2.2.24hoc potius quam gallina tergere palatum, §2.2.25corruptus vanis rerum, quia veneat auro §2.2.26rara avis et picta pandat spectacula cauda: §2.2.27tamquam ad rem attineat quidquam.
Yet I shall hardly rescue you, when a peacock is served, from wishing to wipe your palate with this rather than a chicken, corrupted by the vanity of things, because the rare bird is sold for gold and spreads out a spectacle with its painted tail: as if that had anything to do with the matter!
num vesceris ista, §2.2.28quam laudas, pluma? cocto num adest honor idem?
Do you eat that plumage which you praise? Does the same beauty remain when it is cooked?
§2.2.29carne tamen quamvis distat nil, hac magis illam §2.2.30inparibus formis deceptum te petere esto: §2.2.31unde datum sentis, lupus hic Tiberinus an alto
Though there is no difference in the meat, that you should seek the former rather than the latter, deceived by the unequal appearance, let it be so: but by what sense do you perceive whether this pike gasps, caught in the Tiber or in the deep sea?
§2.2.32captus hiet? pontisne inter iactatus an amnis
Whether it was tossed between the bridges, or near the mouth of the Tuscan river sub-Ostia?
§2.2.33Ostia sub Tusci? laudas, insane, trilibrem §2.2.34mullum, in singula quem minuas pulmenta necesse est.
You praise, madman, a three-pound mullet, which you must necessarily cut into single helpings.
Appearance guides you, I see: to what purpose then do you dislike long pikes?
Because, of course, nature gave a larger size to them, but a brief weight to these: a stomach that is rarely hungry despises common things.
"I should like to see a huge fish stretched out on a huge dish," says a throat worthy of the rapacious Harpies.
at vos §2.2.41praesentes, Austri, coquite horum obsonia.
But you, O southern winds, be present to cook their dainties!
quamquam §2.2.42putet aper rhombusque recens, mala copia quando §2.2.43aegrum sollicitat stomachum, cum rapula plenus §2.2.44atque acidas mavolt inulas.
Although the wild boar and the fresh turbot are already rank, since harmful abundance harasses the sick stomach, when, bloated, it prefers turnips and acid elecampane.
necdum omnis abacta §2.2.45pauperies epulis regum: nam vilibus ovis §2.2.46nigrisque est oleis hodie locus.
Nor is all poverty yet banished from the feasts of kings: for cheap eggs and black olives still find a place today.
Not so long ago, the table of Gallonius the auctioneer was infamous for its sturgeon.
quid? tunc rhombos minus aequor alebat?
What? Did the sea feed fewer turbots then?
The turbot was safe, and the stork safe in its nest, until a praetorian authority taught you.
Therefore, if someone should now declare that roasted cormorants are delicious, the Roman youth, docile in depravity, will obey.
§2.2.53sordidus a tenui victu distabit Ofello §2.2.54iudice: nam frustra vitium vitaveris illud, §2.2.55si te alio pravum detorseris.
A mean life will differ from a simple diet, in the judgment of Ofellus: for in vain will you have avoided that vice, if you twist yourself crookedly in another direction.
Avidienus, §2.2.56cui ‘Canis’ ex vero dictum cognomen adhaeret, §2.2.57quinquennis oleas est et silvestria corna §2.2.58ac nisi mutatum parcit defundere vinum et §2.2.59cuius odorem olei nequeas perferre, (licebit §2.2.60ille repotia, natalis aliosve dierum §2.2.61festos albatus celebret), cornu ipse bilibri §2.2.62caulibus instillat, veteris non parcus aceti.
Avidienus, to whom the nickname of "the Dog" clings with truth, eats five-year-old olives and wild cornel-cherries, and is sparing in pouring out his wine unless it has turned sour, and though you could not endure the smell of his oil (even though he, dressed in white, should celebrate a wedding-feast, a birthday, or other festive days), he himself, from a two-pound horn container, drips it on the cabbage, not sparing of his old vinegar.
§2.2.63quali igitur victu sapiens utetur et horum
What sort of diet then will the wise man use, and which of these will he imitate?
§2.2.64utrum imitabitur? hac urget lupus, hac canis, aiunt.
On this side the wolf presses, on that the dog, as they say.
He will be decent, so as not to offend by dirtiness, and not wretched in his style of living in either direction.