§9.19.1ego meo Ciceroni, quoniam Roma caremus, Arpini potissimum togam puram dedi, idque municipibus nostris fuit gratum.
Since we are deprived of Rome, I gave the plain toga to my Cicero at Arpinum by preference, and this was pleasing to our fellow townsmen.
etsi omnis et illos et qua iter feci maestos adflictosque vidi.
And yet I saw all of them, both those and those where I made my journey, sorrowful and afflicted.
tam tristis et tam atrox est ἀναθεώρησισ huius ingentis mali.
So sad and so shocking is the reconsideration of this immense evil.
dilectus habentur, in hiberna deducuntur.
Levies are being held, they are being led into winter quarters.
ea quae etiam cum a bonis viris, cum iusto in bello, cum modeste fiunt, tamen ipsa per se molesta sunt, quam censes acerba nunc esse, cum a perditis in civili nefario bello petulantissime fiant! cave autem putes quemquam hominem in Italia turpem esse qui hinc absit.
Those things which even when they are done by good men, in a just war, and with moderation, are yet in themselves troublesome—how bitter do you think they are now, when they are done by ruined men in a wicked civil war with the utmost insolence! But beware of thinking that there is any base man in Italy who is absent from this crowd.
vidi ipse Formiis universos neque me hercule umquam homines putavi, et noram omnis sed numquam uno loco videram.
I myself saw them all at Formiae, and by Hercules, I never thought them human beings; and I knew them all, but I had never seen them in one place.
§9.19.2pergamus igitur quo placet et nostra omnia relinquamus, proficiscamur ad eum cui gratior noster adventus erit quam si una fuissemus.
Let us go, therefore, where it pleases, and let us leave all our belongings behind; let us set out to him to whom our arrival will be more welcome than if we had been together from the start.
tum enim eramus in maxima spe, nunc ego quidem in nulla; nec praeter me quisquam Italia cessit nisi qui hunc inimicum sibi putaret.
For then we were in the greatest hope, now indeed I am in none; nor has anyone besides me left Italy, except him who thought this man an enemy to himself.
nec me hercule hoc facio rei publicae causa quam funditus deletam puto, sed ne quis me putet ingratum in eum qui me levavit iis incommodis quibus idem adfecerat, et simul quod ea quae fiunt aut quae certe futura sunt videre non possum.
Nor, by Hercules, do I do this for the sake of the republic, which I think is utterly destroyed, but lest anyone should think me ungrateful to him who relieved me of those difficulties with which he himself had afflicted me, and at the same time because I cannot bear to see those things which are being done, or which will certainly happen.
etiam equidem senatus consulta facta quaedam iam puto, utinam in Volcaci sententiam! sed quid refert? est enim una sententia omnium.
Indeed, I think some decrees of the Senate have already been passed—would that they were in accordance with the proposal of Volcacius! But what does it matter? For the opinion of all is one.
sed erit immitissimus Servius, qui filium misit ad effligendum Cn. Pompeium aut certe capiendum cum Pontio Titiniano.
But Servius will be most cruel, who sent his son to destroy Gnaeus Pompeius, or at least to capture him, along with Pontius Titinianus.
etsi hic quidem timoris causa, ille vero? sed stomachari desinamus et aliquando sentiamus nihil nobis nisi, id quod minime vellem, spiritum reliquum esse.
And yet, this latter indeed did so because of fear, but what of the former? But let us cease to be angry, and at last realize that nothing is left to us except, what I would least wish, our breath.
§9.19.3nos, quoniam superum mare obsidetur, infero navigabimus et, si Puteolis erit difficile, Crotonem petemus aut Thurios et boni cives amantes patriae mare infestum habebimus.
Since the Upper Sea is blockaded, we shall sail by the Lower, and if Puteoli is difficult, we shall seek Croton or Thurii, and as good citizens who love their country, we shall hold the sea infested.
aliam rationem huius belli gerendi nullam video.
I see no other way of conducting this war.
in Aegyptum nos abdemus.
We shall hide ourselves in Egypt.
exercitu pares esse non possumus; pacis fides nulla est.
We cannot be a match for him in army; there is no faith in peace.
§9.19.4sed haec satis deplorata sunt.
But these things have been lamented enough.
tu velim litteras Cephalioni des de omnibus rebus actis, denique etiam de sermonibus hominum, nisi plane obmutuerunt.
I would like you to give a letter to Cephalio about all things done, and finally even about the talk of men, unless they have become completely silent.
ego tuis consiliis usus sum maximeque quod et gravitatem in congressu nostro tenui quam debui et ut ad urbem non accederem perseveravi. quod superest scribe, quaeso, quam accuratissime (iam enim extrema sunt) quid placeat, quid censeas;
I have followed your advice, and especially because I both maintained the dignity in our meeting which I ought to have, and persisted in not approaching the city.
etsi iam nulla dubitatio est.
As for what remains, write, I pray you, as accurately as possible (for these are now the final moments) what pleases you, what you think; though there is now no doubt.
tamen si quid vel potius quicquid veniet in mentem scribas velim.
Yet, if anything, or rather whatever comes to your mind, I would like you to write.