§4.6.1de Lentulo scilicet sic fero ut debeo.
Regarding Lentulus, of course, I bear it as I ought.
virum bonum et magnum hominem et in summa magnitudine animi multa humanitate temperatum perdidimus nosque malo solacio sed non nullo tamen consolamur quod ipsius vicem minime dolemus non ut Saufeius et vestri sed me hercule quia sic amabat patriam ut mihi aliquo deorum beneficio videatur ex eius incendio esse ereptus.
We have lost a good man and a great citizen, one who tempered his supreme greatness of soul with much humanity, and we console ourselves with a poor consolation indeed, yet not none at all, in that we grieve least of all on his own account—not like Saufeius and your friends, but by Hercules, because he so loved his country that he seems to me, by some favor of the gods, to have been snatched away from its conflagration.
nam quid foedius nostra vita, praecipue mea? nam tu quidem, etsi es natura πολιτικόσ, tamen nullam habes propriam servitutem, communi frueris nomine; §4.6.2ego vero qui, si loquor de re publica quod oportet, insanus, si quod opus est, servus existimor, si taceo, oppressus et captus, quo dolore esse debeo? quo sum scilicet, hoc etiam acriore quod ne dolere quidem possum ut non ingratus videar.
For what is more loathsome than our life, especially mine? For you indeed, although you are by nature a political being, yet have no slavery peculiar to yourself; you enjoy a status common to all; but as for me, who, if I speak on public affairs as I ought, am deemed mad, if what is necessary, a slave, and if I keep silence, oppressed and captured, in what grief ought I to be? In that indeed which I am, of course, and in this even more acute because I cannot even grieve without appearing ungrateful.
quid si cessare libeat et in oti portum confugere? nequiquam; immo etiam in bellum et in castra.
What if I should wish to retire and fly to the harbor of leisure? In vain; on the contrary, I am drawn even into war and camp.
ergo erimus ὀπαδοὶ qui ταγοὶ esse noluimus? sic faciendum est, tibi enim ipsi (quoi utinam semper paruissem!) sic video placere.
Shall we then be followers, we who refused to be leaders? It must be done so, for I see that it pleases even you yourself (whom I wish I had always obeyed!).
reliquum iam est
"Σπάρταν ἔλαχες, ταύταν κόσμει"
non me hercule possum et Philoxeno ignosco qui reduci in carcerem maluit.
What remains now is: "Sparta is your lot, adorn her." By Hercules, I cannot do it, and I pardon Philoxenus, who preferred to be taken back to prison.
verum tamen id ipsum mecum in his locis commentor ut ista ne improbem, idque tu cum una erimus confirmabis.
Nevertheless, I practice this very thing with myself in these places so that I may not disapprove of those things, and you will confirm this when we are together.
a te litteras crebro ad me scribi video sed omnis uno tempore accepi.
I see that letters are frequently written to me by you, but I received them all at one time.
quae res etiam auxit dolorem meum.
This circumstance even increased my grief.
casu enim trinas ante legeram quibus meliuscule Lentulo esse scriptum erat.
For by chance I had previously read three in which it was written that Lentulus was a little better.
ecce quartae fulmen! sed ille, ut scripsi, non miser, nos vero ferrei.
Behold, the thunderbolt of the fourth! But he, as I wrote, is not miserable, but we indeed are made of iron.
§4.6.3quod me admones ut scribam illa Hortensiana, in alia incidi non immemor istius mandati tui; sed me hercule in incipiendo refugi ne qui videor stulte illius amici intemperiem non tulisse rursus stulte iniuriam illius faciam inlustrem si quid scripsero, et simul ne βαθύτησ mea quae in agendo apparuit in scribendo sit occultior et aliquid satisfactio levitatis habere videatur.
As to your advising me to write those pieces concerning Hortensius, I have fallen upon other things, not unmindful of that instruction of yours; but, by Hercules, in beginning I shrank back, lest I, who seem foolishly not to have borne my friend's lack of self-control, should again foolishly make his injury prominent if I write anything, and at the same time lest my "depth," which appeared in my actions, should be less apparent in my writing, and my apology should seem to have some character of levity.
§4.6.4sed viderimus; tu modo quam saepissime ad me aliquid.
But we shall see; only do you write something to me as often as possible.
epistulam Lucceio nunc quam misi, qua meas res ut scribat rogo, fac ut ab eo sumas (valde bella est) eumque ut adproperet adhorteris et quod mihi se ita facturum rescripsit agas gratias, domum nostram quoad poteris invisas, Vestorio aliquid significes. valde enim est in me liberalis.
Take care to obtain from Lucceius the letter which I have just sent to him, in which I ask him to write about my achievements (it is very fine), and urge him to hasten, and thank him because he wrote back to me that he would do so. Visit our house as much as you can, and signify something to Vestorius, for he is extremely liberal toward me.