§11.6.1sollicitum esse te cum de tuis communibusque fortunis tum maxime de me ac de dolore meo sentio.
I feel that you are anxious both about your own fortunes and our common ones, and especially about me and my pain.
qui quidem meus dolor non modo non minuitur cum socium sibi adiungit dolorem tuum sed etiam augetur.
This pain of mine, indeed, is so far from being lessened when it joins your pain to itself as a companion, that it is even increased.
omnino pro tua prudentia sentis qua consolatione levari maxime possim.
Altogether, in accordance with your wisdom, you perceive by what consolation I can be most relieved.
probas enim meum consilium negasque mihi quicquam tali tempore potius faciendum fuisse.
For you approve of my decision and say that there was nothing else that I ought rather to have done at such a time.
addis etiam (quod etsi mihi levius est quam tuum iudicium, tamen non est leve) ceteris quoque, id est qui pondus habeant, factum nostrum probari.
You even add (which, although it is of less weight to me than your judgment, is nevertheless not of little weight) that our action is approved by the others too, that is, those who have weight.
id si ita putarem, levius dolerem.
If I believed it to be so, I should grieve less.
§11.6.2"crede"
inquis
"mihi.
"Believe me," you say.
"
credo equidem sed scio quam cupias minui dolorem meum.
Indeed I believe you, but I know how much you desire my pain to be lessened.
me discessisse ab armis numquam paenituit.
I have never regretted having departed from arms.
tanta erat in illis crudelitas, tanta cum barbaris gentibus coniunctio ut non nominatim sed generatim proscriptio esset informata, ut iam omnium iudicio constitutum esset omnium vestrum bona praedam esse illius victoriae.
So great was the cruelty among them, so great the alliance with barbarian nations, that a proscription was planned not by name but by class, so that it was already established by the judgment of all that the property of all of you would be the plunder of that victory.
"vestrum"
plane dico; numquam enim de te ipso nisi crudelissime cogitatum est.
I say "your" plainly; for concerning you yourself, nothing was ever thought of except with the utmost cruelty.
qua re voluntatis me meae numquam paenitebit, consili paenitet.
Therefore, I shall never regret my purpose, but I do regret my plan.
in oppido aliquo mallem resedisse quoad accerserer; minus sermonis subissem, minus accepissem doloris, ipsum hoc me non angeret.
I should have preferred to have remained in some town until I was summoned; I should have undergone less gossip, received less pain, and this very thing would not be tormenting me.
Brundisi iacere in omnis partis est molestum.
To lie idle at Brundisium is troublesome in every respect.
propius accedere, ut suades, quo modo sine lictoribus quos populus dedit possum? qui mihi incolumi adimi non possunt.
How can I approach closer, as you advise, without the lictors whom the people gave me? They cannot be taken away from me as long as my status is unimpaired.
quos ego †non† paulisper cum bacillis in turbam conieci ad oppidum accedens ne quis impetus militum fieret. †recipio tempore me domo te nunc†.
Whom I, not for a little while, cast into the crowd with light staffs as I approached the town, lest any attack by the soldiers should occur. †I adapt myself to the times. Now concerning my house with you†.
§11.6.3ad Oppium et Balbum scripsi quonam iis placeret modo propius accedere ut hac de re considerarent.
I wrote to Oppius and Balbus in what way it would please them that I should approach closer, so that they might consider this matter.
credo fore auctores.
I believe they will advise it.
sic enim recipiunt, Caesari non modo de conservanda sed etiam de augenda mea dignitate curae fore, meque hortantur ut magno animo sim, ut omnia summa sperem.
For they undertake that Caesar will care not only about preserving but even about increasing my dignity, and they exhort me to be of good courage, to hope for all the highest things.
ea spondent, confirmant.
These things they promise, they confirm.
quae quidem mihi exploratiora essent, si remansissem.
Which things indeed would be more certain to me if I had remained.
sed ingero praeterita; vide, quaeso, igitur ea quae restant et explora cum istis et, si putabis opus esse et si istis placebit, quo magis factum nostrum Caesar probet quasi de suorum sententia factum, adhibeantur Trebonius, Pansa, si qui alii, scribantque ad Caesarem me quicquid fecerim de sua sententia fecisse.
But I am repeating past things; look, I beg you, therefore, at those things which remain, and investigate with them, and, if you think it is necessary and if it pleases them, so that Caesar may the more approve of our action as if it were done by the advice of his own friends, let Trebonius, Pansa, and any others be employed, and let them write to Caesar that whatever I did, I did by their advice.
§11.6.4Tulliae meae morbus et imbecillitas corporis me exanimat.
The illness and physical weakness of my dear Tullia dispirits me.
quam tibi intellego magnae curae esse, quod est mihi gratissimum.
Whom I understand to be a great care to you, which is most pleasing to me.
§11.6.5de Pompei exitu mihi dubium numquam fuit.
As for the death of Pompey, it was never doubtful to me.
tanta enim desperatio rerum eius omnium regum et populorum animos occuparat ut quocumque venisset hoc putarem futurum.
For such despair of his affairs had seized the minds of all kings and nations, that I thought this would happen wherever he went.
non possum eius casum non dolere; hominem enim integrum et castum et gravem cognovi.
I cannot help grieving over his misfortune; for I knew him to be an upright, clean, and serious man.
§11.6.6de Fannio consoler te? perniciosa loquebatur de mansione tua.
Should I console you concerning Fannius? He used to say ruinous things about your remaining in Italy.
L. vero Lentulus Hortensi domum sibi et Caesaris hortos et Baias desponderat.
Indeed Lucius Lentulus had promised to himself the house of Hortensius, and the gardens of Caesar, and Baiae.
omnino haec eodem modo ex hac parte fiunt, nisi quod illud erat infinitum.
Altogether, these things are done in the same way on this side, except that that side was infinite.
omnes enim qui in Italia manserant hostium numero habebantur.
For all who had remained in Italy were regarded as enemies.
sed velim haec aliquando solutiore animo.
But I should like to discuss these things some time with a more relaxed mind.
Quintum fratrem audio profectum in Asiam ut deprecaretur.
I hear that my brother Quintus has set out for Asia to plead for pardon.
de filio nihil audivi; sed quaere ex Diochare Caesaris liberto quem ego non vidi, qui istas Alexandrea litteras attulit.
About his son I have heard nothing; but inquire of Diochares, Caesar's freedman, whom I have not seen, who brought those letters from Alexandria.
is dicitur vidisse Quintum euntem an iam in Asia.
He is said to have seen Quintus on his journey or already in Asia.
tuas litteras prout res postulat exspecto.
I expect your letter as the circumstance demands.
quas velim cures quam primum ad me perferendas.
Which I would like you to take care to have delivered to me as soon as possible.
iiii K. Decembr.
November 27.