§10.8.1et res ipsa monebat et tu ostenderas et ego videbam de iis rebus quas intercipi periculosum esset finem inter nos scribendi fieri tempus esse.
Both the matter itself was warning us, and you had shown, and I myself saw, that it was time for an end to be made of our writing to each other about those things which it would be dangerous to have intercepted.
sed cum ad me saepe mea Tullia scribat orans ut quid in Hispania geratur exspectem et semper adscribat idem videri tibi idque ipse etiam ex tuis litteris intellexerim, non puto esse alienum me ad te quid de ea re sentiam scribere.
But since my Tullia often writes to me, entreating that I should wait to see what is being done in Spain, and always adds that the same seems best to you, and I myself have also understood this from your letters, I do not think it is out of place for me to write to you what I think on that matter.
§10.8.2consilium istud tunc esset prudens, ut mihi videtur, si nostras rationes ad Hispaniensem casum accommodaturi essemus; quod fieri necesse est enim aut, id quod maxime velim, pelli istum ab Hispania aut trahi id bellum aut istum, ut confidere videtur, apprehendere Hispanias.
That plan of yours would have been prudent then, as it seems to me, if we were going to adapt our plans to the event in Spain; for one of these things must happen: either, which I should most wish, that fellow is driven out of Spain, or the war is prolonged, or he, as he seems to feel confident, seizes the Spains.
si pelletur, quam gratus aut quam honestus tum erit ad Pompeium noster adventus, cum ipsum Curionem ad eum transiturum putem? sin trahitur bellum, quid exspectem aut quam diu? relinquitur ut, si vincimur in Hispania, quiescamus.
If he is driven out, how welcome or how honorable then will be our arrival to Pompey, when I think Curio himself will cross over to him? But if the war is prolonged, what am I to wait for, or how long? It remains that, if we are defeated in Spain, we should remain quiet.
id ego contra puto.
I think the opposite.
istum enim victorem magis relinquendum puto quam victum et dubitantem magis quam fidentem suis rebus.
For I think that fellow should be abandoned rather when he is victorious than when defeated, and rather when he is confident than when doubting his fortunes.
nam caedem video si vicerit et impetum in privatorum pecunias et exsulum reditum et tabulas novas et turpissimorum honores et regnum non modo Romano homini sed ne Persae quidem cuiquam tolerabile.
For I foresee slaughter if he wins, an attack on the property of private individuals, the return of exiles, a cancellation of debts, offices for the most worthless, and a tyranny intolerable not only to a Roman but even to any Persian.
§10.8.3Tacita esse poterit indignitas nostra? pati poterunt oculi me cum Gabinio sententiam dicere, et quidem illum rogari prius? praesto esse clientem tuum Clodium, C. Atei Plaguleium, ceteros? sed cur inimicos conligo, qui meos necessarios a me defensos nec videre in curia sine dolore nec versari inter eos sine dedecore potero? quid si ne id quidem est exploratum fore ut mihi liceat? scribunt enim ad me amici eius me illi nullo modo satis fecisse quod in senatum non venerim.
Will our humiliation be able to remain silent? Will my eyes be able to bear to see me giving my opinion along with Gabinius, and indeed him being asked first? To see your client Clodius present, Plaguleius the client of C. Ateius, and the rest? But why do I collect enemies, when I shall not be able to look upon my own friends whom I have defended in the senate without pain, nor to move among them without disgrace? What if it is not even certain that this will be permitted to me? For his friends write to me that I have in no way satisfied him because I did not come into the senate.
tamenne dubitemus an ei nos etiam cum periculo venditemus, quicum coniuncti ne cum praemio quidem voluimus esse?
Should we then hesitate whether to sell ourselves to him even with danger, with whom we did not wish to be joined even with a reward?
§10.8.4deinde hoc vide, non esse iudicium de tota contentione in Hispaniis, nisi forte iis amissis arma Pompeium abiecturum putas, cuius omne consilium Themistocleum est.
Next, consider this, that the decision of the whole struggle is not in the Spains, unless by chance you think that Pompey will throw down his arms if they are lost, whose entire strategy is Themistoclean.
existimat enim qui mare teneat eum necesse esse rerum potiri.
For he judges that he who holds the sea must of necessity master the state.
itaque numquam id egit ut Hispaniae per se tenerentur, navalis apparatus ei semper antiquissima cura fuit.
And so he never made it his aim that the Spains should be held for their own sake; naval preparation was always his first care.
navigabit igitur, cum erit tempus, maximis classibus et ad Italiam accedet.
He will sail, therefore, when the time comes, with the largest fleets, and will approach Italy.
in qua nos sedentes quid erimus? nam medios esse iam non licebit.
What shall we be, sitting in it? For to be neutral will no longer be allowed.
classibus adversabimur igitur? quod maius scelus aut tantum denique? quid turpius? †anuival dehic† in absentis solus tuli scelus, eiusdem cum Pompeio et cum reliquis principibus non feram?
Shall we then oppose the fleets? What greater crime, or indeed what crime so great? What is more disgraceful? †...† I alone bore the crime of the absent one; shall I not bear the same when with Pompey and with the rest of the leading men?
§10.8.5quod si iam misso officio periculi ratio habenda est, ab illis est periculum si peccaro, ab hoc si recte fecero, nec ullum in his malis consilium periculo vacuum inveniri potest, ut non sit dubium quin turpiter facere cum periculo fugiamus, quod fugeremus etiam cum salute. †non simul cum Pompeio mare transierimus.
But if, duty having now been dismissed, account must be taken of danger, there is danger from those if I do wrong, and from this one if I do right; nor can any plan free from danger be found in these evils, so that there is no doubt but that we should flee from doing disgracefully with danger, which we should flee from even with safety. †We did not cross the sea at the same time as Pompey.
omnino non potuimus†.
We were altogether unable to do so†.
exstat ratio dierum.
There exists the calculation of the days.
sed tamen (fateamur enim quod est) ne condimus quidem ut possimus.
But yet (for let us confess what is the case) we did not even make an opportunity so that we could.
fefellit ea me res quae fortasse non debuit, sed fefellit.
That matter deceived me which perhaps ought not to have, but it did deceive me.
pacem putavi fore.
I thought there would be peace.
quae si esset iratum mihi Caesarem esse, cum idem amicus esset Pompeio, nolui. senseram enim quam idem essent.
If there should be, I did not want Caesar to be angry with me, while he was also a friend to Pompey; for I had felt how much they were the same.
hoc verens in hanc tarditatem incidi.
Fearing this, I fell into this delay.
sed adsequor omnia si propero, si cunctor amitto.
But I gain everything if I make haste, if I delay I lose everything.