§1.9.21accepisti, quibus rebus adductus quamque rem causamque defenderim, quique meus in re publica sit pro mea parte capessenda status.
have understood by what things I was induced to defend each matter and cause, and what my status in the republic is in undertaking my own part.
de quo sic velim statuas, me haec eadem sensurum fuisse, si mihi integra omnia ac libera fuissent; nam neque pugnandum arbitrarer contra tantas opes neque delendum, etiam si id fieri posset, summorum civium principatum neque permanendum in una sententia conversis rebus ac bonorum voluntatibus mutatis, sed temporibus adsentiendum.
Concerning which, I would wish you to judge thus: that I would have felt these very same things, if all things had been intact and free for me; for I would not have thought that I ought to fight against such great power, nor that the leadership of the leading citizens ought to be destroyed, even if that could be done, nor that I ought to persist in one opinion when circumstances had turned and the wills of the good had changed, but rather that I ought to yield to the times.
numquam enim in praestantibus in re publica gubernanda viris laudata est in una sententia perpetua permansio, sed, ut in enavigando tempestati obsequi artis est, etiam si portum tenere non queas, cum vero id possis mutata velificatione adsequi, stultum est eum tenere cum periculo cursum, quem coeperis, potius quam eo commutato quo velis tamen pervenire, sic, cum omnibus nobis in administranda re publica propositum esse debeat, id quod a me saepissime dictum est, cum dignitate otium, non idem semper dicere, sed idem semper spectare debemus.
For never among men outstanding in governing the republic has a perpetual persistence in one opinion been praised, but, just as in sailing it is a matter of skill to yield to the storm, even if you cannot hold the port, but when you can indeed attain it by changing your sails, it is foolish to hold with danger that course which you began, rather than, by changing it, to arrive nevertheless where you wish, so, since "leisure with dignity" ought to be the proposed goal for all of us in administering the republic—a thing which has been said by me very frequently—we ought not always to say the same things, but always to aim at the same thing.
quam ob rem, ut paulo ante posui, si essent omnia mihi solutissima, tamen in re publica non alius essem atque nunc sum; cum vero in hunc sensum et alliciar beneficiis hominum et compellar iniuriis, facile patior ea me de re publica sentire ac dicere, quae maxime cum mihi tum etiam rei publicae rationibus putem conducere; apertius autem haec ego ac saepius, quod et Quintus, frater meus, legatus est Caesaris et nullum meum minimum dictum, non modo factum, pro Caesare intercessit, quod ille non ita inlustri gratia exceperit, ut ego eum mihi devinctum putarem.
For which reason, as I set down a little before, if all things were completely free for me, yet in the republic I would not be other than I now am; but since in truth I am both enticed into this path by the benefits of men and compelled by injuries, I easily allow myself to feel and say those things about the republic which I think most conducive both to myself and also to the interests of the republic; and I do these things more openly and more frequently because both my brother Quintus is a legate of Caesar, and no least word of mine, not to mention deed, has occurred in favor of Caesar which he did not receive with such illustrious gratitude that I thought him closely bound to me.
itaque eius omni et gratia, quae summa est, et opibus, quas intellegis esse maximas, sic fruor ut meis nec mihi aliter potuisse videor hominum perditorum de me consilia frangere nisi cum praesidiis iis, quae semper habui, nunc etiam potentium benevolentiam coniunxissem. §1.9.22his ego consiliis, si te praesentem habuissem, ut opinio mea fert, essem usus eisdem; novi enim temperantiam et moderationem naturae tuae, novi animum cum mihi amicissimum tum nulla in ceteros malevolentia suffusum contraque cum magnum et excelsum tum etiam apertum et simplicem.
Therefore, I enjoy all his influence, which is supreme, and his resources, which you understand to be very great, just as my own, nor does it seem to me that I could have broken the plans of ruined men concerning me in any other way, unless I had joined to those protections which I have always had, now also the benevolence of the powerful. these same plans, if I had had you present, as my opinion goes, I would have made use of them; for I know the temperance and moderation of your nature, and I know your mind, which is both most friendly to me and imbued with no ill-will toward others, and on the contrary is both great and sublime, and also open and simple.
vidi ego quosdam in te talis, qualis tu eosdem in me videre potuisti; quae me moverunt, movissent eadem te profecto.
I saw certain men behave toward you in such a way as you were able to see those same men behave toward me; those things which moved me would surely have moved you in the same way.
sed, quocumque tempore mihi potestas praesentis tui fuerit, tu eris omnium moderator consiliorum meorum, tibi erit eidem, cui salus mea fuit, etiam dignitas curae; me quidem certe tuarum actionum, sententiarum, voluntatum, rerum denique omnium socium comitemque habebis, neque mihi in omni vita res tam erit ulla proposita, quam ut cotidie vehementius te de me optime meritum esse laetere.
But at whatever time I shall have the power of your presence, you will be the moderator of all my plans; to you, the very same to whom my safety was a care, my dignity also will be a care; indeed, you will certainly have me as a partner and companion in your actions, opinions, wishes, and in short in all your affairs; nor in all my life will any object be so set before me, as that you may daily rejoice more vehemently that you have deserved best of me.