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Plautus · Pseudolus §512-578

The Wager with Simo and Pseudolus's Monologue

Passage 9 of 21 · Latin

Summary

Pseudolus declares his double plan to swindle money from Simo and rescue the flute-girl from the neighboring pimp, persuading Simo and Callipho to watch his trickery. After they exit, Pseudolus addresses the audience, asserting his confidence in his cleverness and his determination to deliver a novel performance.

§512si apstuleris, mirum et magnum facinus feceris.
If you take it away, you will have done a wondrous and great deed.
§513Faciam.
I will do it.
§513bSi non apstuleris?
And if you do not take it away?
§513cVirgis caedito.
Beat me with rods.
§514sed quid, si apstulero?
But what if I do take it away?
§514bDo Iovem testem tibi, §515te aetatem impune habiturum.
I give Jupiter as witness to you, that you shall spend your life unpunished.
§515bFacito ut memineris.
See to it that you remember.
§516Egon ut cavere nequeam, cui praedicitur?
Am I to be unable to be on my guard, when I am forewarned?
§517Praedico, ut caveas.
I forewarn you to be on your guard.
dico, inquam, ut caveas.
I say, I repeat, be on your guard.
cave.
Watch out.
§518em istis mihi tu hodie manibus argentum dabis.
Look, today you will give me the money with those very hands of yours.
§519Edepol mortalem graphicum, si servat fidem.
By Pollux, an exquisite fellow, if he keeps his word.
§520Servitum tibi me abducito, ni fecero.
Drag me away to serve you as a slave, if I do not do it.
§521Bene atque amice dicis.
Indeed, you speak well and in a friendly manner.
†nam nunc, nam meust.
For now, for he is mine.
§522Vin etiam dicam quod vos magis miremini?
Do you want me to tell you something at which you will wonder even more?
§523Studeo hercle audire, nam ted ausculto lubens.
By Hercules, I am eager to hear it, for I listen to you gladly.
§524Prius quam ístam pugnam pugnabo, ego etiam prius §525dabo aliam pugnam claram et commemorabilem.
Before I fight that battle of yours, I will even before perform another battle, famous and memorable.
§526Quam pugnam?
What battle?
§526bEm ab hoc lenone vicino tuo §527per sycophantiam atque per doctos dolos §528tibicinam illam, tuos quam gnatus deperit, §529ea círcumducam lepide lenonem.
Look, from this neighboring pimp of yours, by means of trickery and clever deceits, the flute-girl whom your son is dying of love for, I will beautifully swindle the pimp out of her.
§529bQuid est?
What is that?
§530Effectum hoc hodie reddam utrumque ad vesperum.
I will render both of these accomplished today by evening.
§531Siquidem ístaec opera, ut praedicas, perfeceris, §532virtute regi ágathocli antecesseris.
If indeed you achieve those deeds, as you declare, you will surpass King Agathocles in valor.
§533sed si non faxis, numquid causaest, ilico §534quin te in pistrinum condam?
But if you do not do it, is there any reason why I should not lock you up in the treadmill immediately?
§534bNon unum in diem, §535verum hercle in omnis, quantumst;
Not for one day, but indeed, by Hercules, for all of them, as many as there are.
sed si effecero, §536dabin mi argentum, quod dem lenoni, ilico, §537tua voluntáte?
But if I accomplish it, will you give me the money immediately, which I may give to the pimp, of your own free will?
§537bIus bonum orat Pseudolus; §538dabo inque. §538bAt enim scin quid mihi in mentem venit?
Pseudolus asks what is fair and right; say "I will give." But indeed, do you know what has come into my mind?
§539quid si hisce inter se consenserunt, Callipho, §540aut de compecto faciunt consutis dolis, §541qui me argento intervertant?
What if these men have conspired among themselves, Callipho, or by agreement are acting with stitched-up deceits, to cheat me out of my money?
§541bQuis me audacior §542sit, si istuc facinus audeam? immo sic, Simo:
Who would be more audacious than me, if I should dare such a deed?
§543si sumus compecti seu consilium umquam iniimus §544aut si de ea re umquam inter nos convenimus, §545stilis me totum usque ulmeis conscribito.
No indeed, Simo: if we are in agreement or have ever entered into a plan, or if we have ever agreed between ourselves on this matter, write all over me with elm-wood pens.
§546Indice ludos nunciam, quando lubet.
Announce the games right now, whenever you please.
§547Da in hunc diem operam, Callipho, quaeso mihi, §548ne quo te ad aliud occupes negotium.
Give me your assistance for this day, Callipho, I beg you, so that you do not occupy yourself with any other business.
§549Quin rus ut irem iám heri mecum statueram.
Why, I had already decided yesterday to go to the country.
§550At nunc disturba quas statuisti machinas.
But now, break up the plans you have established.
§551Nunc non abire certum est istac gratia; §552lubidost ludos tuos spectare, Pseudole.
Now I am resolved not to go for your sake; it is my pleasure to watch your games, Pseudolus.
§553et si hunc videbo non dare argentum tibi, §554quod dixit, potius quam id non fiat, ego dabo.
And if I see this man not giving you the money which he said, rather than let it not happen, I will give it.
§555Non demutabo.
I will not change my mind.
§555bNamque edepol, si non dabis, §556clamore magno et multo flagitabere.
For indeed, by Pollux, if you do not give it, you will be demanded of with great and loud clamor.
§557agite amolimini hinc vos intro nunciam §558ac meis vicissim date locum fallaciis.
Go, remove yourselves from here inside now, and in turn give place to my deceits.
§559Fiat, geratur mos tibi.
Let it be done, your wish shall be complied with.
§559bSed te volo §560domi usque adesse.
But I want you to be present at home all the time.
§560bQuin tibi hanc operam dico. —
Why, I dedicate this service to you.
§561At ego ad forum ibo.
But I will go to the forum.
iam hic ero. —
I will be here soon.
§561bActutum redi.
Return immediately.
§562suspicio est mihi nunc vos suspicarier, §563me idcirco haec tanta facinora promittere, §564quo vos oblectem, hanc fabulam dum transigam, §565neque sim facturus quod facturum dixeram.
I suspect that you now suspect, that I promise these great deeds for this reason, that I may delight you while I carry out this play, and that I am not going to do what I said I would do.
§566non demutabo.
I will not change my mind.
atque etiam certum, quod sciam, §567quo id sim facturus pacto nil etiam scio, §568nisi quia futurumst.
And indeed, as far as I know, by what method I am going to do it, I do not know yet at all, except that it will be.
nam qui in scaenam provenit, §569novo módo novom aliquid inventum adferre addecet; §570si id facere nequeat, det locum illi qui queat.
For he who comes out onto the stage ought to bring some new invention in a new manner; if he cannot do that, let him give place to one who can.
§571concedere aliquantisper hinc mi intro lubet, §572dum concenturio in corde sycophantias.
I wish to retire inside from here for a little while, while I marshal the trickeries in my heart.
§573sed mox exibo, non ero vobis morae; §573atibicen vos interibi hic delectaverit. —
But soon I will come out, I will not keep you waiting; meanwhile, the flute-player will have delighted you here.
§574Pro Iúppiter, ut mihi, quídquid ago, lepide ómnia prospereque éveniunt:
By Jupiter, how beautifully and prosperously everything turns out for me, whatever I do!
§575neque quód dubitem neque quód timeam, meo in péctore conditumst cónsilium.
There is no plan hidden in my breast for me to doubt or fear.
§576nam ea stúltitiast, facinús magnum timidó cordi credére; nam omnes §577rés perinde sunt §578ut agás, ut eas magní facias; nam ego ín meo pectore príus
For that is foolishness, to entrust a great deed to a timid heart; for all things are just as you manage them, as you value them highly; for I beforehand in my breast...

Notes

  1. 515te aetatem impune habiturum — This is an accusative with infinitive construction with `esse` omitted from `habiturus esse` (future infinitive of `habeo`), governed by the preceding oath `Do Iovem testem...` ("I give Jupiter as witness..."). `aetatem` is an accusative of duration of time ("for life", "always"), which together with `impune` (
  2. 516Egon ut cavere nequeam — This construction, featuring the conjunction `ut` followed by the subjunctive `nequeam`, is an independent clause of indignation or strong denial (repudiative / indignant `ut`-clause). It expresses a strong rhetorical negation: "Could I (ego with the enclitic -ne) be unable to be on my guard?!"
  3. 520Servitum — This is the accusative supine (supine in -um expressing purpose) of the intransitive verb `servio` ("to serve"), used with the verb of motion `abducito` (future imperative, "drag away") to express purpose: "drag me away to serve (you)."
  4. 529ea círcumducam lepide lenonem — The verb `circumducere` here means "to cheat/swindle," taking the victim as its direct object in the accusative (here `lenonem`). `ea` is a feminine singular ablative referring to `tibicinam` (the flute-girl) mentioned above, expressing the means or respect: "cheat the pimp out of her."
  5. 562suspicio est mihi nunc vos suspicarier — The impersonal expression `suspicio est mihi` ("I have a suspicion/I suspect") is followed by the accusative with infinitive clause `vos suspicarier` as a noun clause. `suspicarier` is an archaic present passive infinitive ending in `-ier` (equivalent to classical `-ari`) of the deponent verb `suspicor` ("to suspect").

Cite this passage

Plautus, Pseudolus §512-578. Humanitext Reader, https://reader.humanitext.ai/en/text/urn:cts:latinLit:phi0119.phi016.humanitext-lat2:512-578

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