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Plautus · Menaechmi §83-147b

Peniculus and the quarrel between Menaechmus and his wife

Passage 2 of 18 · Latin

Summary

The parasite Peniculus explains the strength of the bonds of food and heads to his patron Menaechmus. There, he witnesses Menaechmus quarreling with his wife, stealing her cloak, and planning a dinner with a courtesan.

§83maior lubido est fugere et facere nequiter.
there is a greater desire to run away and act wickedly.
§84nam se ex catenis eximunt aliquo modo.
For they free themselves from chains in some way.
§85tum compediti ánum lima praeterunt §86aut lapide excutiunt clavom.
Then those who are fettered file through the ring with a file, or knock out the rivet with a stone.
nugae sunt eae.
Those things are trifles.
§87quem tu adservare recte, ne aufugiat, voles, §88esca atque potione vinciri decet.
He whom you wish to guard properly, lest he run away, ought to be bound with food and drink.
§89apud ménsam plenam homini rostrum deliges; §90dum tu illi quod edit et quod potet praebeas, §91suo arbitratu ádfatim cottidie, §92numquam edepol fugiet, tam etsi capital fecerit, §93facile adservabis, dúm eo vinclo vincies.
You should tie a man's snout near a full table; as long as you provide him with what he may eat and what he may drink, daily in abundance at his own pleasure, by Pollux, he will never run away, even if he has committed a capital crime; you will easily guard him, as long as you bind him with that bond.
§94ita istaéc nimis lenta vincla sunt escaria: §95quam magis extendas, tanto adstringunt artius.
For those food-bonds are extremely loose: the more you stretch them, the more tightly they bind.
§96nam ego ad Menaechmum húnc eo, quo iam diu §97sum iudicatus; ultro eo ut me vinciat.
For I am going to this Menaechmus, to whom for a long time I have been adjudged; I go of my own accord so that he may bind me.
§98nam illic homo homines non alit, verum educat, §99recreatque: nullus melius medicinam facit.
For that man does not merely feed men, but rather rears and restores them: no one administers medicine better.
§100ita est adulescens; ipsus escae maxumae §101cerialis cenas dat, ita mensas exstruit, §102tantas struices concinnat patinarias: §103standumst in lecto, si quid de summo petas.
Such a young man he is; he himself gives dinners of the greatest food, dinners of Ceres, so he piles up the tables, and prepares such plate-piles: you must stand on the couch if you seek anything from the top.
§104sed mi intervallum iam hos dies multos fuit: §105domi domítus sum usque cum caris meis.
But I have had an interval now for these many days: I have been continually tamed at home with my dear ones.
§106nam neque edo neque emo nisi quod est carissumum.
For I neither eat nor buy anything except what is most expensive.
§107id quoque iam, cari qui instruontur deserunt.
And now those dear things, which are prepared, desert me.
§108nunc ad eum inviso.
Now I am visiting him.
sed aperitur ostium.
But the door is opening.
§109Menaechmum eccum ipsum video, progreditur foras.
Look, I see Menaechmus himself, he is coming out.
§110Ní mala, ni stúlta sies, ni índomita impósque animi, §111quód viro esse odió videas, túte tibi odio habeas.
If you were not bad, if you were not foolish, if you were not untamed and out of your mind, what you see is hateful to your husband, you yourself would hold hateful.
§112praéterhac sí mihi tále post húnc diem §113fáxis, faxó foris vídua visás patrem.
If after this day you do such a thing to me, I will make you see your father outside as a divorced woman.
§114nám quotiens foras íre volo, mé retines, revocás, rogitas, §115quó ego eam, quám rem agam, quíd negotí geram, §116quíd petam, quid feram, quíd foris egerim.
For as often as I want to go out, you hold me back, recall me, ask repeatedly, where I am going, what I am doing, what business I am conducting, what I am seeking, what I am bringing back, what I have done outside.
§117portitorem domum duxi, ita omnem mihi §118rem necesse eloqui est, quidquid egi atque ago.
I have brought a customs-officer home, so necessary is it for me to tell everything, whatever I have done and am doing.
§119nímium ego te habui délicatam; núnc adeo ut factúrus dicam.
I have kept you too pampered; now indeed I will say what I am going to do.
§120quando égo tibi ancillás, penum, §121lanam, aurum, vestem, purpurambene praebeo nec quicquam eges, §122malo cavebis si sapis, virum observare desines.
Since I provide you well with maidservants, provisions, wool, gold, clothing, purple, and you lack nothing, you will beware of trouble if you are wise, and you will stop watching your husband.
§123átque adeo, ne me nequiquam serves, ob eam industriam §124hodie ducam scortum ad cenam atque aliquo condicam foras.
And indeed, lest you watch me in vain, for that diligence I will take a courtesan to dinner today and make an appointment somewhere outside.
§125Illic homo se uxori simulat male loqui, loquitur mihi; §126nam si foris cenat, profecto me, haud uxorem, ulciscitur.
That man pretends to speak badly to his wife, but he speaks to me; for if he dines outside, he surely avenges me, not his wife.
§127Euax, iurgio hercle tandem uxorem abegi ab ianua.
Hurrah! By Hercules, at last I have driven my wife away from the door with a quarrel.
§128ubi súnt amatores mariti? dona quid cessant mihi
Where are the loving husbands?
§129conférre omnes congratulantes, quia pugnavi fortiter?
Why do they delay to heap gifts on me, all congratulating me because I have fought bravely?
§130hánc modo uxori intus pallam surrupui, ad scortum fero.
I have just stolen this cloak from my wife inside, and I am carrying it to a courtesan.
§131sic hóc decet, dari facete verba custodi catae.
Thus it is fitting for words to be wittily given to a clever guardian.
§132hoc fácinus pulchrumst, hoc probumst, hoc lepidumst, hoc factumst fabre: §133meó malo a mala abstuli hoc, ad damnum deferetur.
This deed is beautiful, this is honest, this is charming, this is done skillfully: at my own risk I have taken this from a bad woman, it will be carried to our loss.
§134avórti praedam ab hostibus nostrum salute socium.
I have diverted booty from the enemies with the safety of our allies.
§135Heús adulescens, ecqua in istac pars inest praeda mihi?
Hey, young man, is there any share of that booty in there for me?
§136Perii, in insidias deveni.
I am ruined, I have fallen into an ambush.
§136bImmo in praesidium, ne time.
Nay, into a safeguard, do not fear.
§137Quis homo est?
Who is the man?
§137bEgo sum.
It is I.
§137cO mea Commoditas, o mea Opportunitas, §138salve.
Oh, my Convenience, oh, my Opportunity, hail!
§138bSalve.
Hail!
§138cQuid agis?
How are you doing?
§138dTeneo dextera genium meum.
I am holding my protector-god with my right hand.
§139Non potuisti magis per tempus mi advenire quam advenis.
You could not have arrived at a more timely moment for me than you do.
§140Ita ego soleo: commoditatis omnis articulos scio.
That is my way: I know every joint of opportunity.
§141Vin tu facinus luculentum inspicere?
Do you want to look at a splendid deed?
§141bQuis id coxit coquos?
What cook cooked it?
§142iam sciam, si quid titubatumst, ubi reliquias videro.
I shall know soon if there has been any mistake, when I see the leftovers.
§143Dic mi, enumquam tu vidisti tabulam pictam in pariete, §144ubi aquila Catameitum raperet aut ubi Venus Adoneum?
Tell me, have you ever seen a painted picture on a wall, where the eagle snatched Catamitus, or where Venus snatched Adonis?
§145Saepe.
Often.
sed quid istaé picturae ad me attinent?
But what do those pictures have to do with me?
§145bAge me aspice.
Come, look at me.
§146ecquid adsimulo similiter?
Do I resemble them at all?
§146bQuis istest ornatus tuos?
What is that outfit of yours?
§147Dic hominem lepidissimum esse me.
Say that I am a most charming man.
§147bVbi essuri sumus?
Where are we going to eat?

Notes

  1. 87quem tu adservare recte, ne aufugiat, voles, — The antecedent (such as eum) of the relative pronoun quem is omitted in the main clause, functioning as the subject accusative of the infinitive vinciri.
  2. 95quam magis extendas, tanto adstringunt artius. — A form of the correlative structure quo / quam magis ... tanto (magis), expressing a proportional comparison: "the more you stretch them, the more tightly they bind."
  3. 110Ní mala, ni stúlta sies, — sies is an archaic present subjunctive form (corresponding to classical sis). It forms the protasis of a condition with ni (= nisi) criticizing the wife's behavior.
  4. 113fáxis, faxó — Both are archaic verbal forms common in colloquial speech and comedy; faxis stands for feceris (perfect subjunctive or future perfect), and faxo stands for faciam (future).
  5. 126me, haud uxorem, ulciscitur — While ulciscitur usually means "to avenge/punish," here it is used humorously: by dining out, Menaechmus "avenges" Peniculus (by feeding him) rather than punishing his wife.

Cite this passage

Plautus, Menaechmi §83-147b. Humanitext Reader, https://reader.humanitext.ai/en/text/urn:cts:latinLit:phi0119.phi010.humanitext-lat2:83-147b

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