Timon or The Misanthrope

​Timon Always complaining, even if he, alone of all the others, gets the whole cake or the entire pig—whatever is the very essence of gluttony and insatiability. A drunkard and riotous over wine, not only as far as singing and dancing go, but even to abuse and rage. Furthermore, there are many speeches over the cup, and especially then, concerning temperance and orderliness; and he says these things when already in a bad way under the influence of unmixed wine and babbling ridiculously; then vomiting follows upon this; and finally, some men lift him up and carry him out of the banquet, clutching the flute-girl with both hands. Nevertheless, even when sober, he would yield the first place to no one for lying, impudence, or love of money; on the contrary, he is first among flatterers, perjures himself most readily, imposture leads the way and shamelessness follows close behind, and altogether he is a most clever thing, precise in every way, and accomplished in various manners. Therefore he shall cry before long, being such a “worthy” fellow. What is this? Good heavens, Thrasycles has been a long time coming to us.

​Thrasycles I have not come for the same reasons as these many, Timon, who, gaping at your wealth, have run together in the hope of silver, gold, and sumptuous dinners, about to display much flattery to a man simple-hearted and ready to share his possessions like you. For you know that a barley-loaf is a sufficient dinner for me, and the sweetest relish is thyme or cress, or, if I should ever play the epicure, a little salt; and my drink is the water of the Nine-springs; and this old cloak is better than any purple robe you please. For gold seems to me no more precious than the pebbles on the beaches. But I set out for your own sake, so that wealth, this worst and most treacherous possession, which has often been the cause of incurable disasters to many, might not corrupt you. For if you would obey me, it would be best indeed to cast it all into the sea, since it is not at all necessary for a good man who is able to see the wealth of philosophy—not indeed into the deep, my good friend, but wading in up to the groin, a little before the surf, with me alone looking on.

​Thrasycles But if you do not wish this, then in another and better way carry it out of your house in haste, not leaving even an obol for yourself, distributing it to all who are in need, to one five drachmas, to another a mina, to another a half-talent; and if any be a philosopher, he is justly entitled to receive a double or triple portion. And for me—though I do not ask for my own sake, but so that I may share it with those of my companions who are in need—it is enough if you would fill this wallet and provide it, which does not hold even two whole Aeginetan medimnoi. For one who practices philosophy must be frugal and moderate, and think of nothing beyond his wallet. Timon I praise these words of yours, Thrasycles; but before the wallet, if you please, let me fill your head with blows, measuring them out with my spade. Thrasycles O democracy and laws! We are being beaten by this accursed man in a free city! Timon Why are you angry, my good friend? Have I given you short measure? Indeed, I will throw in four choenikes above the measure.

​Timon But what is this? Many are coming together—Blepsias over there, and Laches, and Gniphon, and the whole company of those who shall weep. So why should I not go up onto this rock, let my spade rest a little, which has been laboring for a long time, and, having gathered as many stones as possible, rain them down upon them from afar? Blepsias Do not throw, Timon! For we are going away. Timon But not without blood, nor without wounds, shall you depart.