Timon or The Misanthrope

​Gnathonides Did I not say that the gods would not neglect Timon, a good man? Hail, Timon, most comely, most sweet, and most convivial of companions! Timon Yes, and you too, Gnathonides, most voracious of all vultures, and most rascally of men! Gnathonides Always fond of a joke, you are. But where is the banquet? For I have come bringing you some new song from the recently produced dithyrambs. Timon Indeed, you shall sing elegies right plaintively under this mattock. Gnathonides What is this? Are you striking me, Timon? I call you to witness! O Heracles, alas, alas! I summon you to the Areopagus for wounding! Timon And indeed, if you delay even a little, I shall soon be summoned for murder. Gnathonides By no means! But at least heal my wound by sprinkling a little gold on it; for that remedy is wonderfully staunching. Timon Are you still staying? Gnathonides I am going; but you shall not get away with it, having become so brutal after being so kind.

​Timon Who is this coming up, the bald-headed one? Philiades, the most loathsome of all flatterers. This fellow, who received a whole estate from me, and two talents as a dowry for his daughter, as the reward for his praise—whenever I sang and all others were silent, he alone praised me to the skies, swearing that I was more musical than the swans—when he saw me sick the other day and I went to him in need of help, this noble gentleman laid blows upon me.

​Philiades Oh, what impudence! Now you recognize Timon? Now Gnathonides is a friend and drinking companion? Therefore he has suffered what he deserved, being so ungrateful. But we, his old intimates, classmates, and fellow-demesmen, nevertheless keep our distance, so that we may not seem to pounce upon him. Hail, master, and see that you guard against these filthy flatterers, who are friends only at the table, but in other respects differ in no way from crows. No one of the present day is to be trusted any longer; all are ungrateful and wicked. I, bringing you a talent so that you might have it to use for your urgent needs, heard on the road, when already near, that you were rich with some immense wealth. I have come, therefore, to advise you on these matters; and yet, being so wise, you will perhaps have no need of words from me, who could even advise Nestor on what is necessary. Timon So it shall be, Philiades. However, draw near, that I may welcome you too with the mattock. Philiades Good people, my skull has been broken by this ungrateful wretch, because I was advising him for his own good!

​Timon Look, here comes a third, the orator Demeas, holding a decree in his right hand and claiming to be our kinsman. This fellow, when he was fined sixteen talents to the city and was imprisoned because he did not pay—and I took pity on him and ransomed him by paying it in a single day—when recently he was allotted to distribute the theater-money to the Erechtheis tribe and I approached him asking for my share, he said he did not recognize me as a citizen.

​Demeas Hail, Timon, the great benefit of our race, the bulwark of Athens, the shield of Greece! Indeed, the assembled assembly and both the councils have long been waiting for you. But first hear the decree which I have written on your behalf: “Whereas Timon, son of Echecrates, of the deme Collytus, a man not only noble and good, but also wise as no other in Greece, continually persists in doing the best for the city, and has won the boxing, wrestling, and footrace at Olympia on a single day, and also with the four-horse chariot and the pair of colts—“ Timon But I have never even been a spectator at Olympia! Demeas What of it? You will spectate later; it is better that many such things be added. “And furthermore, he distinguished himself last year on behalf of the city near Acharnae, and cut to pieces two divisions of the Peloponnesians—“